


Tired Of Talking

by xsoiir



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-27
Updated: 2016-09-14
Packaged: 2018-06-04 21:05:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 13
Words: 26,148
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6675415
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xsoiir/pseuds/xsoiir
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Do you sometimes just feel your hand slip away? Something just feels different about you babe. </p><p>Raphael has been slipping further into his depression induced alcoholism after his father's, Hamato Yoshi/Master Splinter, death. The others have been trying to rebuild their lives as well, and Leonardo is doing the best he can to keep the family together, as well as himself. April O'Neil is ready to have a baby with her husband, Casey Jones, but when a woman re-enters their lives, will things stay the same, or will everything change?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Don't Wanna Hear About Your Crazy Drunk Night Out

Casey’s POV

 

            “April, babe, I just don’ tink we’re ready fo dat. S’nothin’ personal,” April let out a dissatisfied growl, throwing down the towel she had been using to wipe the dishes dry with.

            “If not now, then when, Casey? You can’t just keep going out every night with Raph, getting dunk, doing vigilante shit. We’re married. You have a wife, a job; I thought you wanted to start a family. We’ve been married for two years now Casey—two years! If not now, then when,” the anger in her voice crumbled away with each word and it was replaced with sadness. I didn’t want to have this argument with her, I just didn’t think we were ready. We are young! We still have plenty of years to start a family and ‘grow up’, as she puts it.

            “Sorry Apes, like I said, it ain’t nothin’ personal, I just tink we should, you know, live our lives the way we wan’ for a while. S’not that I don’ wan’ them wit’ you. I just don’ tink we’re ready for them right now,” I walked over to her and wrapped my arms around her. She lowered her head for a moment before lifting it back up and scowling at me. It’s something she does when she heard something she didn’t like or agree with. April removed herself from my embrace gently and turned away.

            “Go, you’re going to be late for your ‘boys’ night out’. Don’t get into too much trouble. I’m going to bed,” and with that she walked past me to the bedroom. I groaned softly, leaning my head back as I turned towards her retreating figure. It’s the same shit, it seems like, every night. She didn’t even give me a kiss.

            ‘Oh man, Apes pissed’ I thought to myself and I opened the closet door and pulled out my hockey mask, along with my golf bag that contained bats, golf clubs, and hockey sticks. I slung it over my shoulder and made sure I had my keys before I embarked out the window, towards the meeting place.

 

Time skip

            “Sound ta me like she was pretty mad ‘bout it,” Raph commented and he drank the last bit of his Corona. I nodded my head in agreement, holding my third beer in both hands looking out at the New York night life. “Aye, don’ worry ‘bout it. She’ll get over it, ya Head Case,” my head moved violently to the side as Raph pushed it. I let out a growl and punched his shoulder.

            “I know, it just seems like it’s the same shit different day, ya know? I just wan’ us to go back to tha ol’ days. Those were good times,” I gulped down the last of my beer and stood up to stretch my legs. We had been out here for about an hour now, and Raph had drank a whole case of beer by himself. I didn’t know whether I should feel concerned or not for the increase in his alcohol intake recently, but I tried to remind myself that Raph was an adult, and he could take care of himself. Plus, with Master Splinta…

            “Ya really are a Space Case, aren’t ya,” The question brought me back from Casey land, causing me to make a ‘huh’ noise at the comment. “I was sayin’ that shit happens, bro. You gotta just roll wit’ tha punches; plus dis is April ya talkin’ ‘bout. Sometimes she can be a little…obsessive—ya know, when things don’ go her way and all,” I laughed a little at what he was saying, ‘cause it’s true. “Did you hear that,” I immediately looked at Raph, who was now standing in a defensive posture looking over at the other side of the roof top. I shook my head but took the defensive anyways, arming myself with a bat and my hockey mask.

 

            “Ah Shell, not you,” I muttered as Karai and some of her foot soldiers emerged from the shadows. We’ve been fighting these guys none stop since the guy’s defeated Shredder. Karai is claiming that she’s revenging her father’s death, but really I think the bitch just gets off on getting her ass kicked.

 

            “I could say the same think about seeing you, trash,” She hissed, drawing out her katana. Raph immediately shot up and pulled out his sais, twirling them in his hands expertly. The night fell silent as the wind swept up our hair, causing goose pimples to raise on the back on my neck. Something did not feel right, this was going to be more trouble that it is worth.

 

            “Just go,” I stated, raising my hockey stick to my shoulder. Half of Karai’s face was covered in a moonlight shadow, causing the whole thing to feel even more wrong. She let out a low chuckle, dropping her head a bit. With a shake of her head, she gave us a crude smirk.

           

            “Just go? That is so funny, coming from you two. Now, hold still while I slice your necks open, just like that rat,” she spat out, cackling into the night sky. This is not going to be good was all that I could think, on repeat. With one glance at Raph’s face, I knew that this was going to get ugly. His body was rigid, still as a rock, and his chin muscle was moving from him clenching his teeth together in rage. His knuckles were turning a pale green from him holding on his two sais as hard as he was.

 

Time skip

            “Shit, Raph, why’d you have to charge into battle like that? Oh god, Raph stay wit’ me. You’re gonna be okay—ah shit that’s a lot of blood,” Raph had sustained a new crack to his plastron, a large gash in his thigh, and a good concussion. The idiot just charged in after Karai mentioned his father and in a drunken rage thought he could take them all on. Fuck, now he’s bleeding out on some random apartment building and I know the others won’t make it in time.

            I pulled out my cell phone and scrolled through my contact list. I found the name that I wanted and prayed to god that she still owned the same number. The line rung a few times and I was starting to get extremely impatient when I hear the voice of an angel on the other side of the phone.

            “Casey,” the voice questioned.

            “Zoe, listen, I don’t have much time to explain—are you home,” I glanced around the block. I’m pretty sure she lived close by.

            “Yes, Casey what is going on? Are you alri—,“

            “Do you live at the same apartment,” I questioned.

            “Yeah, what’s going o—,“

            “No time, just have ya window unlocked and I’ll be there in five. Can I trust ya,”

            “Of course, Casey what’s goin-” I hung up. Hoisting Raph onto my back, I dragged us to the fire escape on the side of building, trying to ignore the warm, wet liquid that was staining my shirt and dripping down my back.          

            “Raph, buddy, listen: ya literally can’t die on me, bro,” I choked out, managing to make it to the ground. “Imma getcha some help, okay? An’ ya gonna be fine,” I made my way down the alley way, staggering from the extra weight of Raph’s fat ass. “By the way, when this is all over wit’, ya gotta loose some fuckin’ weight, ‘kay buddy,” I felt a light rush of air on my neck; a sign that Raph was attempting to laugh. Good.


	2. I Don't Believe You Just Passed Out On Couch

Chapter 2

            Raphael laid bandaged on Zoe’s couch with a slight pink hue bleeding through white. Zoe was looking at me expectantly, her arms crossed and blood stains scattered across her whole being. I knew what she wanted, but all I could do is stare at Raphael’s form, passed out on the couch on the brink of death.

            “I gotta make a phone call,” I stated, pushing past her to make my way onto the balcony. I pulled out my phone to find three missed calls and several more text messages from all the guys. Pressing Leo’s number I put the phone back up to my ear.

            “Where the hell are you, Jones,” Leo growled into my ear, clearly annoyed with the fact that they probably made it to the rooftop Raph and I had been at an hour ago. “There is blood everywhere, what is going on,” he questioned again when I said nothing in return.

            “There was an accident,” was all I managed to choke out, tears stinging at my eyes and threatening to pull over to my cheeks. Taking in a deep breath to collect myself, I cleared my throat and began telling Leo exactly what happened, only choking up when I mentioned how he had charged into the crowd of foot ninja to fight his way to Karai, only to end up fatally injured by her and her clan members. Leo listened silently as I finished up my story, and sighed loudly on the other end of the phone.

            “Where are you now,” He demanded, clearly still angry at the fact that I was not where I should have been. I gulped, knowing how much trouble this was going to be to explain when they three others arrived at Zoe’s.

            “That’s the thing, and it’s hard to explain, but I’m only a few building down,” the nervousness in my voice could not be hidden. I heard Leo growl out on the other line, cursing a bit before he put the phone back up to his ear. I could him breathing harder, a tell-tale sign that Leonardo was going to absolutely not only chew my ass out, but when Raph got better, chew his out and punish him as harshly as possible. That asshole.

            “Give me the address, Casey, and we will discuss this when we arrive,” I could hear Michelangelo whisper ‘dude’ in the background as I rattled off Zoe’s address to Leo, only to hear the line click dead immediately after. I pulled the phone slowly away from my face and stared at the home screen on my phone, spacing out.

            A soft touch on my shoulder brought me back down to earth, and also made me practically jump out of my skin. I whipped around and grabbed the arm to whom it belonged to and threw them into the balcony’s metal railing. Zoe’s startled face stared back at my horrified one, and I immediately released her wrist and took a space creating step back. She immediately took a step forward, taking my face into her hands, stroking my cheek lightly with her thumb. I grabbed her hand in mine, looking at her concerned face. That was the great thing about Zoe, she always knew when to keep the silence, and when to break them.

            “Are you in trouble, Case,” her voice was soft, trying hard not to startle me further. I shook my head, and bowed my head further into her embrace. A soft thud could be heard on the rooftop, immediately making me step away from Zoe and look at the rooftop. Leo, Don, and Mikey all stared at us from the shadows of the rooftop, their eyes glowing in the dark. Zoe’s light gasp could be heard as she looked up too.

            “You definitely better explain this one, Casey Jones,” Leonardo grounded out through his clenched teeth, a trait him and Raphael shared. I nodded my head, leading them back into the apartment, hiding them from the outside world. Zoe closed the door and closed the blinds, spinning around to look at the three large humanoid turtles standing in her apartment living room, staring at her as if she was the enemy. The distrust towards her was radiating off of them, or should I say Leo, like a tidal wave.

            “Who are you,” he demanded, staring her down. She shuffled from one foot to another, her eyes shifting from Leo, to the other turtles, towards me, back. Finally, after a few seconds, she cleared her throat and trained her eyes on Leo’s form, taking him in, studying every detail of him. Looking back at Leo, I could see him shift from one foot to his other, a nervous habit he had when someone looked at him for too long.

            “My name is Zoe, Zoe Rose Lucid. I was born on May 16, 1993, meaning that I am twenty-three years old. I have my bachelor’s in Animal Science, which is why your, uh, brother is here on my couch, patched up. It is always the reason why Case, here, brought your brother to me instead of waiting for you to show up. If he would have waiting ten minutes longer, your brother would have bled out on the rooftop. I know nothing else about any of you. Casey will not explain any of this to me, so if you could please explain that to me I would really love to know why four humanoid turtles are in my apartment living room. Thanks,” She cocked her head to the side, crossing her arms over her chest and staring Leo down. He cleared his throat and looked over at the couch where Raph was passed out. Taking a deep, calming breath through his nose, he exhaled out his mouth and finally looked back at Zoe.

            “It all started twenty-six years ago. Sit down, this origin story is a long one,” He offered a small, fake smile at Zoe. She rolled her eyes at him but did as he request, sitting on the edge of her window ledge. Everyone else found a spot either on the floor or leaning against the wall. As Leo explained the story, Zoe would nod her head, squint her eyes, or make surprised faces. When Leo finally finished she looked down at the floor, glaring hard at it.

            “I am so sorry to hear about your father. That is a terrible thing to go through. As for this chick, Karai, that is also unfortunate. Sounds like she could use a nice beating,” She looked back at Leo who actually gave her a real, but still small, smile. Everyone nodded their heads in agreement. “Could you fellows please excuse Casey and I while we talk privately,” she requested, lightly placing her hand on my elbow.

            Leo nodded his head curtly, turning his head to look over at Raph. Donatello was already checking over her work and Mikey was going through her refrigerator, already feeling at home in the new space. I got up from my place of the wall and allowed her to drag me to her bedroom, where she shut the door lightly and turned to look at me.

            “After all these years, you show up with a large humanoid turtle who was bleeding to death, expecting me to patch him up, then his brothers show up and now I find out you’re married. Jones, what the actual fuck, dude,” she spat out, crossing her arms and glaring up at my face. She reminded me so much of April at the moment, I couldn’t help but let a low chuckle escape my mouth. “This is anything but funny, Casey. I want an explanation from your lips. I want to hear what you have to say for yourself,” I groaned and rubbed my hands down my face, cupping them over my mouth and closing my eyes. After a couple moment, I dropped them to my sides and sat on the edge of her bed.

            “I dun’ know wha’ ta tell ya, Zo. Yah, it has been a couple a’ years since I seen ya, hell even talked ta ya’. It just was weird, ya know? After everything that happened. But tonight I couldn’t think of anyone else, but ya, to come ta. I knew you would help me and tha’ guys out. I really do appreciate it, Zo, really,” I looked up at her face, hopeful that it was enough. It wasn’t, of course. This is just how my life is, never satisfying anyone and always getting into bigger messes than I can clean up.

            “It was weird. That is why you haven’t called, you haven’t texted, haven’t even stopped by? You know my father died recently too. I wanted for weeks for you to call, to tell me you heard and that you are on your way over to watch stupid kung-fu movies with me to make me forget. We were together for four years, Casey. Four years, I thought I deserved at least a little of your time. Our breakup was mutual. We both knew that we weren’t meant for each other, but now you’re married? What the actual fuck Jones,” She threw her hands up, her voice still soft so the others wouldn’t hear us, but it was getting thick with emotion that she had bottled up. I ran my hands through my hair and let out a loud sigh.

            “I didn’t hear ‘bout that, M’sorry. If I had, I woulda been ova’ here in a heartbeat, Rose, ya know that,” I breathed out, pushing myself up from her bed to grab her arm gently. “I am married, her name is April O’Neil, now April Jones I guess, and she’s a perfect for me. She’s a news anchor, and she’s really smart, ya know, totally out of my league,” I paused, noticing the scowl that made its way onto Zoe’s face. “Aw, geeze, Zo, I didn’t mean it like that,” She threw her hand up into my face, telling me to stop talking.

            “Whatever, it’s fine. Just, you know, get the bleeding mutant turtle couch and have your fancy wife cut my a check for a new one. Also, don’t come back here unless you have a real apology,” she spat out, turning briskly to open the door and head back out to the living room.

            “Fuckin’ shit fuck, fa’ reals,” I whispered to myself, before heading out after her. Mikey had devoured her whole pantry, Leonardo was observing all of the photo’s that Zoe had around the apartment, and Donatello was crouched in front of Raph, who was sitting on the edge of the couch holding his side. “Ya already up,” I stated, causing Raph to look up at me.

            “Ya, I am. Where, uh, are we,” He questioned before looking over at Zoe, who was currently sitting at her bar table, snacking on some chips with Mikey. “and who the hell is that,” he asked once more.

            “Name’s Zoe, I saved your life,” She stated simply, looking over a pita chip before popping it into her mouth, not even bothering looking over at Raph. He snorted, before looking back at me with a confused look. I nodded my head, agreeing with what she said.

            “Let’s get you home, Raphael,” Leonardo spoke up, turning his attention from the photo of Zoe and her Dad when she was sixteen, back to Raph. Donatello hummed in agreement, gently placing Raph’s arm around his shoulder and slowly pulling him to his feet. Raphael inhaled sharply, letting us all know that his injuries hurt like a bitch.

            “I have some pain medication if you guys want to take some home; they are designed from aquatic reptiles. Here, take them. Give him three since, well, you guys are giant compared to other reptiles,” she tossed the bottle to Leo who caught them with ease and handed them to Donatello. He observed the bottle before nodded and tucking them into his belt.

            “These will be great to have, thank you Zoe,” Donatello chided, leading Raphael to the back door. “Have a great night, be safe,” he called over his shoulder, disappearing into the darkness that consumed the city’s alley way. She nodded as each of them disappeared into the darkness, leaving me behind. I awkwardly rubbed my hands on my blood-stained jeans, my gaze shifting from her, to the wall behind her.

            “Don’t forget that check, Jones,” she said simply, walking over to her front door, unlocking it and opening it slightly, signaling for me to leave. I nodded, giving her a grimace, and walked out of her front door. I paused right outside and turned around to say something, only to find the door closing right in my face. ‘Great, now two women in my life are absolutely pissed at me,’ I thought as I made my way to the elevator door.


	3. I Can See It, Something In The Way You Move

Chapter 3

            April glowered at me from her side of the couch, steaming from the story I just provided her with. After coming home last night with a couple bruised ribs, a black eye, a cut on my lip, and a phone call from Leo, April was absolutely outraged. It took her three hours to calm down enough to go to sleep, and now it is eight in the morning and she woke me up demanding an explanation. So I gave it to her.

            Her chocolatey brown eyes were glaring lightly at me until she settled them onto the tan carpeting below us. I watched as she had an internal conversation with herself and every now and again her eyebrows would knit together; no doubt in my mind she was debating on whether or not to kick me out for the next few nights. Sighing, I ran my fingers through my hair and leaned back into the plush backing on the couch. April was already pissed at me last night for leaving, now she’s probably never going to accept any of my apologies. Where am I going wrong?

            “So, this Zoe girl, you were in a long-lasting relationship with her? And she was the first person you though to go to, because she was a veterinarian. You don’t, maybe, think that she will go to the police or the FBI because she is still mad at you for the break up? That was very irresponsible, even for you Casey. You could have called me, or waited! I just don’t understand,” her words ran off her lips as she spaced out again, still staring intently at the floor. I reached forward and put my hand on her thigh, bringing her back into reality.

            “For one thing, Zoe definitely won’t go ta tha’ police ‘bout dis Apes. She ain’t like dat. For two, yeah. She was duh first one I thought o’when I was watchin’ Raph bleed ta death in fron’ o’me. She’s a Vet, Apes. She’s good at dis kind o’stuff! Ya’ can’t be mad at me for dis,” I reasoned, shooting her a pleading look. April’s eyes locked onto mine, and I finally noticed them melting into an understanding gaze. That’s my girl.

            “I get it. Sorry, I just…you’ve never talked about her before. I didn’t even know she existed until an hour ago, Casey. Doesn’t that seem a little strange to you? That you never told me about your ex-girlfriend? It seems strange to me. I want to meet her,” she demanded, staring intently into my eyes. I felt my blood run cold, starting from my chest and working its way through my limbs. April wants to meet Zoe? But why? It is in the past.

            “No,” I manage to say after a couple minutes of silence. I could hardly bring myself to say it, especially because this is April, and let’s get real: I never say no to April unless it’s on making a baby, or letting her put makeup on me. Her eyes held shock, and I had to lower my gaze to the floor to help alleviate the guilt that was building up inside of me like cement blocks, weighing me down and making it hard to breathe.

            “I don’t understand! That isn’t fair Casey,” She shoots up from her spot on the couch and walks over to the window to stare out at the city. Her arms are crossed and I can tell by the way she is breathing that she is trying hard not to cry. “She’s your ex-girlfriend, I want to meet her. I don’t understand. She was something special to you, and she still seems to be. I don’t feel comfortable with you having contact with her without me meeting her. I love you,” She turns around from the window to face me “but I can’t sit here at night wondering if you’re off with your ex-girlfriend when you say you’re going out with Raph. This isn’t fair to me”.

            I close my eyes and let go of the breath I was holding. My life is seriously took complicated for me at the moment. Shooting up from my spot on the couch, I move forward to wrap April into my arms. She rests her head against my chest and I can feel the wetness from her tears dripping onto my shirt. Slowly, I reach my hand up to stroke her hair in comfort. “I’ll think ‘bout it, ‘kay,” I whisper into her hair, kissing it gently and resting my head on top of hers.

 

At the Lair: Raphael’s POV

            I know one thing that’s for sure right now: Leo is a fucking dick. I’ve been bed rest for a week now, with my only salvation being that I’m allowed to meditate. No practicing for a month until my plastron’s crack heals up. It has been torture. Add on the fact that Fearless has been an absolute dick since it happened and you’ve got the icing on the cake. I just want to land one on his loud, bossy fucking mouth sometimes.

            Throwing my head back into the mattress in anger, I immediately wish I hadn’t. The quick movement had caused the thin layer of skin on my plastron to move, causing a sharp, stabbing pain to it. Now I really fucking hate Fearless. If he could just learn to shut the hell up sometimes and get the stick out of his ass, maybe I wouldn’t have to go out so much with Casey and have a couple beers. Also, if he hadn’t have been fucking around with Karai behind our backs, maybe she wouldn’t have picked a fight with us that night too. She can claim that she is revenging the death of her father, but let’s get something straight: That bitch did not care about her father one bit. All she cares about is the fact that Leo is done with her manipulative and lying ways and tossed her ass to the side after…

            I feel another sharp pain in my plastron, but this time it isn’t from the crack; it’s a pain far worse than that. One that takes a long time to heal. Sometimes I think this is never going to go away, the anguish I feel over…father. I wish you were here. Was there something I could have done differently? If I had just been a little stronger, faster, a little tougher would you have made it? Throwing my arms over my eyes, I close them in some attempt to finally get some sleep, though I know it will be in vain. This pain doesn’t let me sleep. Father…

 

Leo’s Point Of View

            I stared forward at the commotion going on in the living room. Raphael and Michelangelo were currently playing Mario Kart and Mikey was absolutely whooping on Raph, and he was not taking it well. But of course he couldn’t throw a temper tantrum like he usually would, so he’s settled on yelling obscenities at Mikey and the television. Feeling a hand on my shoulder, I look over my shoulder to see Donatello giving me a small smile. Returning it, I nodded towards the commotion and let out a breathy chuckle.

            “Seems so normal, doesn’t it,” Don commented quietly, standing next to me now to also observe. I nod gently, looking back at the two goofs in the living room as well.

            “Yeah, normal,” my words came out almost silently, trickling from my lips and falling upon deaf ears.

            “Are you going out again, Leo? This is the fourth night this week you’ve gone out by yourself,” Don exclaimed, still careful to keep quiet so the other two don’t over hear us. Don was always perceptive like that. I give him a brisk nod, not feeling like giving an explanation.

            The truth is, that I’ve been keeping watch on Zoe’s apartment since two weeks ago when I found out that Casey had allowed another human know of our existence. I have to make sure that she doesn’t leak any information of our existence, so I’ve been patrolling the city by myself but keeping my last spot at her apartment complex, where I’ll spend a couple hours monitoring who comes and goes and what her routine is.

            Another truth is that during this time I’ve also gotten to know Zoe Lucid quite well. I know that she owns her own Veterinarian office; she works long hours, often leaving before day break and coming home well after the sun has set. I also know that she wears her hair up when she is stressed out, inquisitive, or in what I call ‘work-mode’. If her hair is down, I always know that she is relaxed, at-ease, and almost lazy in her attitude. Zoe also eats take-out Chinese on Monday’s and Wednesday’s because those are the days that she comes home later. She orders pork lo-mien and egg rolls from the Chinese place a couple blocks down. She’ll eat it while she finished up on the paper work from her previous hours at work; a work-a-holic like Don, in that way.

            “I’ll see you guys later, okay,” I break the silence that had fallen upon the lair. Raph flipped me the bird, while Don just patted my shoulder. Mikey was so enveloped in Mario Kart that he didn’t even realize I said anything. Chuckling lowly, I make my way to the entrance of the lair and make my way on my usual routine.

            When I finally reach my final stop, Zoe’s apartment, I perch myself on top of an air conditioning unit that is perfectly placed in the shadows, but close enough to the ledge that I get an okay view at the streets and her apartment. She’s currently watching television, her blonde hair falling down beside her in tendrils of curls. Whatever she is watching must be funny, too, because she is covering her mouth to keep her laughter as quiet as possible, but it seems she’s struggling to keep her composure—and now she’s spitting out her drink everywhere. I almost have to cover my own mouth to keep from bursting out at the scene displayed in front of me.

            This woman is so beautiful. Not just physically, but mentally as well. I notice the care she takes with her patients, spending long hours at the office to monitor them and to give them her undivided attention. When she gets home, she makes sure that her apartment is clean and in order before she settles down for the night, sometimes only to end up finishing up her paper work. She also takes great care of herself, going to yoga classes in the morning every other day before work. The woman is in great shape if you ask me, very nice to look at. Her honey blonde hair always has a sleek look, shining whenever the light hits it. Not a lot of woman in New York can say that. A lot of them do so much crap to their hair that they sport frizzy, damaged, and lackluster hair. Zoe also has these beautiful curls that fall across her back and shoulders, giving her a pleasingly wild look to her. Almost matches her personality. She has a spirited side to her—okay Leo now you just seem creepy.

            I stand up on the unit that I’ve been perched on and stretch my limbs, ready to call it a night early since it seems this woman won’t be a threat to our existence soon. As soon as I prepare to launch myself onto the building, I hear the sound of rocks crunching underneath a pair of sneaker and freeze immediately.

            “Interestin’ ta find ya’ here, Leo,” I hear a thick Brooklyn accent call out to me. A scowl instantly appears on my face, but I am quick to replace it with a placid look and turn to face the owner of the voice.

            “Casey,” I say simply, staring at him with a blank look. I’m increasingly finding myself more and more pissed off with him these days. First it was because he and Raph were getting themselves into more danger with the Purple Dragons, then it was because he was allowing Raphael to drown his depression in booze, and now it is because he has exposed to yet another human. Master Splinter would understand this disappointment and anger I feel towards Casey Jones at the moment.

            “Are you watchin’ her, Leo? What the hell, man,” He exclaims throwing his hands up in the air, looking at my bewildered. I take a step forward and shush him, giving him a hard glare. He holds my gaze with the same heated-look I was currently giving him.

            “No. I’m not watching her. But because of you and Raph’s screw up, I have to come in, AGAIN, and clean up the mess. You know how tiring it is to be the ones that have to fix everything you guys manage to fuck up, Casey? It is exhausting. I’m just trying to keep this family together, please understand that. I’m making sure this, Zoe, woman doesn’t manage to leak any information of our existence. Such sloppy work on your part, Jones,” I spat out, pushing him back slightly to make room between us before I really let loose. He steadies himself and lets out a growl, giving me his ‘here’s johnny’ look. Oh boo hoo, dude.

            “This is fucking weird, Leo. How long have you been doing this for? She ain’t gonna tell nobody, ‘kay? So jus’, stop ‘kay? She’s good,” he replied back, holding his palms out towards me. I look down at the rooftops gravel, kicking it slightly with my foot.

            “Two weeks,” I mumble out, not meeting his gaze. I hear him blow some air out of his nose, a clear indication that he is disagreeing with what he’s hear.

            “Stop it,” he finally says after a couple minutes of silence. “She ain’ gon’ tell no one, ‘kay? I’ve already made sure o’ it,” he finished, rubbing his hands through his onyx hair. I nod, feeling the warmth of relief spread through my veins. I can finally breathe easy knowing that I can trust Jones, and this Zoe girl.

            “Fine,” I say, turning my back to him and bolting on the rooftops to make it home in time to get at least a few hours of sleep. Training for Raph will resume in the next week or two and I need to prepare the Hashi for his punishment, although I’m pretty sure meditating has been punishment enough.


	4. You're Acting Like There's Something Left To Prove

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is a short chapter, but they should be a little more lengthy from here on out. Feel free to comment and give kudos! I appreciate you all!

Chapter 4

Zoe’s Point Of View

            I ran my fingers through my hair as I stared at the chart for my most recent patient; a dog that had been beyond mutilated by a taxi cab on 12th street. The owner said they had let the dog off the leash to roam around the park but the dog, Barrett, had decided that he was going to chase after the first car he saw, resulting in him being run over by the taxi cab before the owner even had a chance to blink. I honestly couldn’t blame the owner for letting the dog off the leash, they were at the park, but this mistake could be a fatal one. Sighing loudly I placed my face into the palms of my hands, grounding them into the flesh on my forehead and rubbing slow circles into it. There has to be some hope for Barrett, there just has to be. I rip my glasses off my face in frustration and lightly toss them by my computer, roughly pushing my chair backwards and bolting out of my seat to grab a beer. After the day—no, week I’ve had, I deserve to have at least one beer, right? Right. Cue me currently chugging the beer and releasing a very satisfied sigh.

            I grab another one for good measure and start to head back to my work when I hear a knock on my apartment door. Freezing immediately, my eyebrows knit together in confusion as I stare at the front door. I’m definitely not expecting anyone, so who in the hell could that be, especially at ten o’clock at night! Swiftly moving over to the front door I take a peek out of the peep hole; a beautiful, fiery red-haired woman stood in front of my apartment, looking around the hallway while she clutches a brand new black Kate Spade purse. She was dressed in a purple pea-coat that was buttoned up almost to the top, exposing the top of her white button-up with purple paisleys printed all over it. When the red-haired mystery woman turned back around to face the door again, I realized exactly who she was.

            Unlocking the door and swinging it open, I immediately leaned against the door frame and gave the woman in front of me an unimpressed look. The sudden movement must have startled her, because she had taken a step back and was clutching her hands against her chest, with flushed cheeks and big, green eyes. I can definitely see why Casey was so smitten with her that he married her.

            “Can I help you, April O’Neil,” I say casually, still managing to look at her unimpressed. She immediately clears her throat and starts fussing with her hair, still looking at me with a shocked expression. “You know, for a news reporter, you really aren’t that talkative,” I casually added, pointed my finger at her with a raised eyebrow. April chuckles nervously and extended out her hand, offering me a bright smile.

            “I’m April O’Neil, but you already knew that,” we shake hands briefly before she takes a step away from me, clutching her purse like she had been before I opened the door. “I wanted to come meet you myself, seeing as you and Casey used to have a very close relationship,” I roll my eyes but take a step back, motioning for her to come in. Once she’s inside I shut the door and lock it, only to lean against it and watch April. She moves like gypsy dancer; fluid and poetic in her movement, calculated and cool. Once again, Casey sure does have a type.

            “It’s nice to meet the woman that managed to tie down Casey, I guess,” I started off, finally pushing myself off the door and walking over to the island counter that April had seated herself at. She was busying herself by looking around the apartment, probably taking it in and trying to figure out my personality and who I was. “We were close, but we aren’t now, so why are you here, April,” her eyes slowly drifted to look across the table at me. Her eyes had a mischievous sparkle to them that caused my stomach to knot up.

            “Like I said, I wanted to meet you. Casey doesn’t know I’m here, though. He didn’t want me to meet you,” she pauses and she looks down and starts drawing patterns into the concrete marble colored countertop. “Since we’re married, that doesn’t sit well with me. I’m not usually a jealous person, but the fact that I didn’t even know you existed until last night does not sit well with me. He has always been honest and open with me about everything, so why not about you,” her eyes shyly flicker to look into mine, making the knot in my stomach tighten up twice as hard. I knew she was waiting for an answer, but honestly the knot in my stomach was making it hard to breathe.

            “I…Casey, we…April, listen,” I blew out some air trying to think of a way to explain the way Casey and I ended things without having to tell the whole story. “Casey and I are from different worlds. We ended things because he wanted me to focus on school and to build a career for myself and I wanted to discover more about myself as well. You’re very lucky to have him, April. He wouldn’t want you to be upset about this, it’s just—he’s never been good at talking about us. I guess he feels guilty because, well, after we split up I thought he would still be there for me, as a friend, but he fell off the map and I never heard a single word from him again. I just think he doesn’t know how to put it in words without sound like a bad guy, and he really loves you. He wouldn’t want you to think of him as a lesser man, because if he is still the Casey I knew, then he probably doesn’t feel like he deserves you. He’s older than me by six years. We started dating when I was seventeen and he was twenty-three,” I faded off, memories of Casey and I when we were together flashing like photographs in my mind, making me wish I could reach out and touch them, just to feel that sort of carelessness and love again.

            It took a long time for April to respond, and I honestly couldn’t blame her. I was being vague with my answers, and her being a reporter, she probably wanted the full story. Casey told her nothing and all I did was make everything more confusing for the poor woman.

            “Okay,” she drew out, her cherry-colored eyebrows knitted together. “okay,” she repeated once more. I took a long time to study her facial features, admiring how beautiful she was in person, as well as on screen. “I guess I can understand now. Thank you, for uh, letting me into your home without actually knowing my intention. I could have been a psycho and you wouldn’t have known it, and yet you took a chance on me. That means a lot to me, and I can definitely see why Casey wouldn’t want to talk about it. I should probably get back home to him,” She looked up at me in worry, hoping that I wasn’t offended by the fact that she was telling me basically that she was going to go home to my ex-boyfriend and fuck his brains out as an apology. Chuckling quietly to myself, I push myself up off the counter and towards the door, opening it slightly and gesturing with my head that I think she should head out too.

            She took the hint and made her way out the door and a few steps out into the hallway before she suddenly turned around again. My eyebrows shot up in surprise as I look at April, waiting for her to say whatever it was she had to. The look on her face was confident and charming, almost like the persona she puts on in front of the camera for work.

            “And Zoe,” her voice was so sugary sweet that it made my teeth hurt just listening to her, “if you speak about Raphael, or any of the boys, I know where you live, and I will hurt you. Bad,” and with that she turned on her heels and danced down the hallway towards the elevator with absolute confidence.

            “Maybe she is a psycho,” I whispered to myself as I shut the door and locked it, making a mental note to never cross that woman.


	5. On and On and On It Goes

Chapter 5

Zoe’s Point Of View

            How I never noticed it the night before, I don’t know, but one thing is for sure is that I’m making double notes to never cross April O’Neil. She is a sneaky woman, I tell you. You see, this morning when I woke up, I dragged myself into the kitchen to make some coffee. As I sluggishly sat down (more like slumped down) into my bar stool I realized that there was a colorful, rectangular piece of paper laying on the counter, in the exact spot that she had been sitting at the night before. Not really bothering with it, I immediately made myself way to the coffee maker when it filled itself with enough golden brown liquid to at least get my heart beating again. Chugging down the steaming, hot, caramel flavored liquid, I resisted the urge to spit it back out as it burnt my tongue.

            “Dammit, god, fuck, shit, that fuckin’ hurts,” I choked out, setting the mug full of my golden bliss down on the table and running towards the freezer to pull out an ice cube, only to eagerly pop that son of a bitch into my mouth to help cool down the third degree burn my tongue probably just sustained. I should really be more careful. I leaned against the counter with my palms resting against the cool marble, staring down at the mug when I realized what that piece of paper was: a check made out to me from April O’Neil for a thousand dollars. Slowly picking it up and bringing it towards my face I realized that on the memo line it said “new couch”. Suddenly I found myself laughing out loud, the check laying safely on the marbled counter top as I clutched my stomach. When I told Casey Jones that I wanted money for my check, the shit head took me seriously. ‘Oh well,’ I thought, “Atleast I get a new couch.”.

 

Time Skip

            Shutting the door to the vet’s officer, I quickly shoved the key into the keyhole and twisted it to the left, pulling furiously on the door handle to make sure that it was securely locked. ‘Shit, did I set the alarm,’ I thought as I stared into the dark office. ‘Yeah, I did,’ I reassured myself, wrapping my coat around me a little tighter as I started on my way home. I’m usually not as cautious about locking up the shop, but for the past month and a half I’ve had this sense that someone has been watching me. At first I thought maybe it was Casey, shit even April, but now I’m having this weird feeling that it is someone I hardly, or don’t, even know. It causes goosebumps to rise on my skin immediately every time I turn my back to lock the front doors. Now I’m having that feeling again, but this time something in the back of my head is telling me to run, so I do.

            Sprinting down the street I notice that one of the street lights on the corner is out, making it look dark and ominous in a ‘you’re going to be beat up, raped, and kidnapped then probably killed and dump off in B.F.E.’ type of way. So I slow down, trying to catch my breath and taking a long look over my shoulder to make sure no one was actually following me, which they weren’t. My mother always told me to trust my gut instinct, but right now I’m thinking that I may just be a paranoid psycho. ‘Calm down, no one is following you, dumb ass,’ I repeat to myself, finally looking towards the street light. My heart lurched into my throat when I saw a shadowy figure standing under the dark street light on the corner of the street. I still had two blocks to walk and it’s a Wednesday night, meaning that not a lot of people will be out walking the street tonight because they are at homes with their family or friends just trying to get through their work week. ‘Fuck, just keep walking. Maybe they aren’t a serial killer,’ I preach to myself, trying to remain as calm as possible.

            As I approach the figure, I can make out the dim light burning on the edge of their cigarette as they inhale its poison into their lung. They are staring my down, the whites of their eyes burning an eerie image into my brain for the rest of eternity.

            “Hello,” a deep rumble came from their throat, a cue that this person had been smoking for a long time. “How’s it goin’ sweetheart,” he tried once more, tossing his cigarette on the ground and stomping on it with his steel toed boot. I quickly scanned his face and body to take in every detail in case I needed to repeat back to anyone what they looked like.

            “I’m good, thanks,” I ushered out, picking out my pace to match the speed my heart was hammering out. The heavy sound of the man’s boots were echoing off the buildings as he followed me. Repeating the details I obtained from scanning him, I vaguely remembered the glow of the purple dragon tattoo that seemed to slither up his forearm to his bicep and disappearing underneath his black t-shirt. ‘Shit, he’s a fucking purple dragon. When the hell did they start leaking into this part of town,’ I panicked, picking my pace up into almost a light jog now. The clunk of the dragon’s boots behind me indicated that he, too, picked up his pace and was gaining on me. ‘I’m seriously dead,’ that thought was immediately lost as I screamed out as loud as I could, feeling the man grab a fist full of my hair and yanking it towards him.

 

Raphael’s Point Of View

            After weeks of meditating and being punished in the Hashi, Fearless finally let me come out for Patrol with them. And of course there was nothing good going on tonight, seeing as it was a Wednesday night and everyone was at home doing god who knows, and god who fucking cares. Leo was on one of his power trips, too. Mikey was on the receiving end of it this time, though. Him being, well, Mikey, and loud, he managed to alert some humans of our hide out on top of the rooftops, causing them to look up and almost spot Leo, which of course caused Leo to go into a fucking tizzy. God, I could seriously use a beer right about now.

            “Cut tha’ shit out, Fearless. He fuckin’ gets it, ‘kay,” I spat, giving him a hard look as I took a step between him and Mikey. Leo’s lip immediately pulled into a snarl as he also took a step towards me, his eyes blazing with anger.

            “I’m the leader of this team, Raph, and when I say that Mikey needs to learn how to control himself, I mean it, so step aside and let me finish,” He spat out, grounding his teeth together. I could see the muscle in his jaw tensing and untensing as he clenched his jaw together; it’s something I do quite often when I’m mad.

            In the background we could hear Mikey whisper, and not so quietly, ‘Dude, they haven’t had this fight in like, thirty minutes bro,’ to Donatello. I immediately clenched my fist together in anticipation to the fight that was bubbling below the surface between us. The air turn rigid as we continued to stare eachother down, waiting for the other one to give in.

            “Yeah,” I finally started after a couple minutes, “’Cause ya the fuckin’ leader and all, right Leo,” I grounded, my voice losing itself somewhere in the throat, something that happens when I get extremely pissed off.

            “Oh come off of it, Raph! You know exactly why I was chosen to be leader—you couldn’t even begin to lead this team even if you tried,” Donatello could be heard in the background groaning as he threw his head back and turned to walk away from the scene.

            I took a threatening step towards Leo, jabbing my finger right into his face.

            “Why don’t you shut the fuck up, Leo. Ya always on our backs, like we don’ have a fuckin’ clue how to be ninjas, or sumthin’. Not like we’ve trained to be ninjas our whole life or anythin’; or did ya forget that we were there too, training right next to you, learnin’ just like you. You ain’t that fuckin’ special,” I pushing my finger forcefully into his plastron, giving him the meanest look I could muster up.

            “How could I forget, Raph! You make it really hard not to notice you when you throw a temper tantrum every damn day! When you make colossal sized mistakes that I have to clean up because you’re to incompetent too—you know what, Raph. Go home, you’re dismissed from patrol tonight. I can’t deal with you,” He brought his hands up to his temples to rub them, signaling that he was trying to calm himself down. Unlike him, though, I couldn’t just calm down; that fucker just told me to go home. No! I have been cooped up in that damn place for too long.

            Taking off on the rooftops, I run towards the opposite side of town. Who the hell does this guy think he is, anyways? Telling me what to do. I can’t stand him when he’s like that! If Leo could just get that fucking stick out of his ass, maybe we could get along and I wouldn’t be as fucking mad all the time. The feeling of him breathing down my neck every damn second of the day would be enough to drive anyone to insanity.

            “No—Stop please,” I immediately halted, skillfully maneuvering myself to the edge of the rooftop. How did I miss the scene that is playing our before my eyes? Oh geez.

            “Shut the fuck up, and do exactly as I say and I promise I’ll try to be a little gentle with you, sweetheart,” The scum bag hoarsely whispered into the woman’s hair. Her face was pressed against the brick building with this guy pressing himself into her backside, his face pressed in her blonde hair. I immediately cracked my neck, feeling the excitement of finally getting to beat down some fuckin’ scum and to release atleast some of the frustration that has been building for weeks since I got hurt.

            “Let her go,” my voice came out gravelly. Both eyes suddenly flickered up to the rooftop, the guy yanking the woman away from the night and shielding himself with her body. “Coward,” I whispered hatefully, silently making my way down into the alley way behind him. “Next time you decide to handle a woman that way, remember this,” immediately my fist lashed out to the back of the guy’s head, knocking him out almost instantly on impact. A gash that was created on impact started to bleed out, causing the woman to gasp loudly. ‘Shit, I forgot about her,’ I panicked, looking at her with wide eyes.

            That was when I realized who it was.

            “Ay, you’re that woman from a couple weeks ago,” I put my hands on my Sai’s, a natural instinct learned from many years fighting out on the street. She shot up from the ground and immediately started to dust off her coat with was speckled with blood splatters; both hers and the scum on the ground.

            “You’re that mutant turtled that bled out on my couch; hi,” she replied, finally meeting my gaze. I could feel my stomach tighten up with anger as I soaked in her sentence.

            “Oh, what, because I’m some sorta freak ya can’t be bothered by me? I just saved ya from gettin’ raped, and probably killed, lady,” the sentenced shot out of my mouth before I had a chance to think through what I was saying, something I do all the time that gets me in a heap of shit.

            “No, no,” Her voice was hoarse, probably from screaming her head off for someone to help, “No, it’s not like that. I’m…sorry, okay? I’m Zoe, I don’t know if you remember that,” she offered her hand up for me to shake. My eyebrows immediately knitted themselves together, incredulous to this woman’s actions. I was just the biggest asshole to her, and here she is offering to shake my mutant fucking hands. “I don’t bite, promise,” her voice was playful, and when I lifted my eyes to look from her hand to her eyes I found an equally playful shine to them.

            “Raphael, and yes, I do remember you. You’re one crazy chick, letting a mutant turtle bleed out on your couch. By the way, those pain killers worked like fuckin’ magic,” I reached over and shook her hand, offering her a confident smirk as I did. My heart was pounding in my ears as she gave me the widest smile I’d ever seen from anyone. “I should get you home,” I practically choked out, covering it up by clearing my throat.

            “Yeah, home. Uh, it’s two blocks away and honestly, I think I twisted my ankle when that guy forced my face into the brick wall,” she trailed off, her eyes glazing over as she recalled the traumatic events from tonight.

            “I’ll take you, get on,” I turned around, offering my shell for her to climb on. I felt her hands softly touch the middle of my shell, slowly making their way to my neck. Goosebump erupted all of my skin, causing my to clear my throat. “Ya gonna get on, or are ya gonna molest my freakin’ shell all night, lady,” I spat turning my head to look at her. She looked up at me in awe, her hands draw into her chest tightly.

            “No, sorry, it’s just that, uh, you have a very beautiful shell. Out of all the turtles I’ve seen and treated, yours has a very unique pattern. I won’t do it again, promise,” Her hands shot out to latch onto my neck and she jumped on my shell. I quickly grabbed her legs, jumping onto the rooftop to give her a better look at the city. “Do you remember where my apartment was,” she asked, bring her face over my shoulder to look at my face. I grunted in response. “It’s that building over there off of 18th street,” I followed her finger to a fairly tall apartment building, maybe five stories high.

            I took off towards her building, jumped from rooftop to rooftop. Zoe was giving small noises of fright to delight as we jumped, dropping from one rooftop to jumping high onto the next. I could feel her hot breath on my neck, and fought the blush that was rising up from it.

            “Here ya go,” we landed on top of her apartment building. She climbed down off of my shell and grabbed my arm. I flinched away from her, before relaxing again, realizing she wasn’t going to hurt me. “I should go,” I turned away from her only to hear her call out, ‘wait’.

            “Would you like to come inside? I’ve got some beer in the fridge,” she tried again, walking closer to me. “I’m on the top floor, and my apartment is pretty spacious. Not to make you feel bad, but you did bleed all over my brand new couch. You could at least come in and have a beer with me so I can learn about the guy who I saved,” a smirk immediately adorned her lips, and I have to admit it was probably the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen someone do.

            “Actually,” my voice didn’t betray me this time, “I saved your ass, so yeah, I’ll take a beer as celebration,” I tried to make my voice sound as cocky as possible, crossing my arms for good measure. She chuckled softly, spinning around on her heels to head towards the rooftop door leading to her floor.

            “I’ll unlock the window for you, I’m of that side,” she pointed to the corner that her apartment resided in. I nodded and made my way over to her balcony, making sure that I stayed hidden in the shadows so no one else could spot me. A couple minutes passed before I heard the latch on her window click, and the sound of metal shifting screeched into my ears. “Come on,” she whispered, sticking her head out of the window and looking into the alley way.

            “Boo,” I quickly shoved her lightly, giving her a good scare.

            “Jesus Christ, dick, get the hell in here,” she quickly whipped her head around to face me, a playful glare on her face to mask the fact that I just scared the crap out of her.


	6. Cause I've Been Nothing But Good To You

Chapter 6

Zoe’s Point Of View

            “Yeah, Case can be a dick sometimes,” I was telling Raph about the time Casey managed to prank me by filling my whole car with itching powder. He thought it was the funniest thing in the world and was barking with laughter. Or it could be the fact that this guy is already on his sixth beer, either way it was nice to see that he can relax around me. It’s been a few hours since I invited him over and I’ve learned that Raphael is good company to keep. He is sarcastic, funny, boisterous, and honestly he reminds me a lot of Casey. I can see why the two get along so well (and why they can beat the shit out of each other when they don’t).

            “Holy shit, tha’s some funny shit,” Raph wiped the tears from his eyes, laying his empty Corona on the coffee table in front of the couch. I watched in amusement as he attempted to stand up, but stumbled into the corner of the coffee table. “Ah, shit, that fuckin’ hurt,” he exclaimed before adding just as loud, “I gotta take a piss,” and making his way through the hall to find my bathroom. I chuckled lowly, watching him stumble down the hallway. My measly two beers didn’t do much but give me a slight buzz, making everything a little more enjoyable but still managing to be coherent. Once I heard the bathroom door shut, I leaned forward and put my head in my hands, rubbing my eyes. Tonight had to be one of the scariest nights of my life; why that guy chose me is beyond me, I’m just glad that Raphael had showed up when he did or I would have been toast.

            Throwing my hands down to my knees and standing up, I grab my empty bottle as well as Raphael’s and take them over to the trash, tossing them in with two loud ‘clinks’. The pizza I ordered was practically non-existent thanks to Raphael, leaving only two slices from an xtra-large; that guy sure could eat. ‘Probably why he’s a fucking beast’ I thought to myself, mentally laughing as I put the pizza away in the fridge.

            “I should probably get goin’, Leo’s probably worried sick,” I practically jumped out of my skin when Raphael’s voice cut through the silent air. He immediately put a calming hand on my shoulder, realizing how startling that probably was. “Ah, shit, sorry Zoe. I didn’ even think. Ya gonna be okay,” he turned me around to face him. His electric green eyes stood out even more when his eyes were bloodshot, a sign that he was definitely close to being drunk. I forced a fake smile on my face and nodded, lowering my eyes immediately to stare at the scar that adorned his plastron; the one I had patched up, the one that could have ended his life if Casey hadn’t had such quick thinking. Raphael dropped his hand from my shoulder and turned away from me, almost in a shy manner. “Okay, I’mma leave then,” his voice shook a little, but he covered it up by rubbing his nose with his hand aggressively and stalking over to the window.

            “Hey Raphael,” I called out, stopping him before he flew out of my window, “it was really nice to hang out. I hope we can do it more often,” I was rubbing my hands together, a nervous habit I’d had since I was young. He turned back to me and gave me a genuine smile, nodding his head and twirling his toothpick to the other side of his mouth before darting out of the window, disappearing into the nights’ shadows. I stared in amazement, and flew over to the window to look and see if I could find him. To my amazement, he was nowhere to be seen, so I shut the window and locked it. Closing the blinds, I walked down the hallway to my bedroom and got dressed for bed.

 

Time Skip

            I took a half day today after the girls at the office said they would be fine without me. Honestly after last night I did not want to be at the office alone tonight, which I knew I would be if I hadn’t taken the half day, and decided to take my ass to a spa. Booking my appointment and grabbing up my coat, I tossed it on and grabbing my keys before shooting down the hallway to the waiting room. My hand shot out instinctively, waving at the nurses and the other doctors as I shot out the front door and onto the busy street of New York. Taking a big breath in, I released a huge sigh of satisfaction, feeling a cool breeze caress my face. I gave the first real smile since last night and made my way down the street towards the spa, ready to relax and forget about all of my problems and stresses, if only for a moment.

            The Receptionist immediately greeted me as I entered the building, her blue eyes glowing softly in the fluorescent lighting. Her strawberry blonde hair had a beautiful shine under the lighting as well, and I stopped for a moment to take in her appearance. She had freckles adorning her face, speckling them like glitter. Offering the biggest smile I could muster, I gave her my name and my appointment time and she furiously typed away on the computer keyboard before giving a small ‘aha’.

            “They are ready for you now, actually. No need to wait, Ms. Lucid! I’ll let them know you are here. Please have a seat,” her voice was as sweet as sugar, and her smile lit up her face. I couldn’t help but feel envy swell up inside me like a poison, cooling my blood. This woman was so beautiful and I was definitely jealous of her; she probably goes on dates all the time. I nodded back with another small smile thrown her way, and took a seat in their waiting room.

            Now that I thought about it, I hadn’t been on a date in over four months. The last date I went on, the guy managed to let it slip that he had a date with someone else an hour before he met me. Not only did he go home alone that night, but he also would be buying himself a new dress shirt, thanks to my wine ‘accidentally’ splashing into his face. The scum bag even tried to call me a couple days later to set up a second date; I laughed for three minutes straight before I hung up on him. He never called me back.

            The thing is, that I don’t think I need a man in my life. I’m completely content with being single, honest, it would just be nice to spend some time with someone else. Maybe have a friend that I could go out with, talk to, you know, confide in. Spending the time I did last night with Raphael was really nice, and I have this aching to do it again. He and I just seemed to have a great connection and talking to him was easy. It just seemed like he really understood me and had the same sense of humor as me, which is really hard to find a guy who has the same sick, twisted, and perverted sense of humor as me. Spending time with him would be really nice.

            “Ms. Lucid, I’m ready for you,” a soft, feminine voice chimed. My head whipped up to look at the person who dragged me out of my train of thought. A slim framed, short, petite woman stood in front of me. Her brown hair was curled into spirals that cascaded over her shoulders and stopped right beneath her chest. She, too, had freckles that were like little angel kisses, spreading from cheek to cheek. The woman was absolutely adorable, if you ask me, and I immediately felt relaxed in her presence. ‘This was a great idea,’ I mentally cheered, high fiving myself.

 

Raphael’s Point Of View

            I woke up to a loud banging noise on my bedroom door and to Mikey beat boxing to the beat he was laying out. Annoyed, I picked up my alarm clock and chucked it at the door, hearing a loud screech immediately after. Everything fell quiet and I was immediately satisfied, smirking to myself in victory as I covered my face with the pillow again to catch some more sleep. A couple seconds go by before I hear the door being swung open and something heavy jumped on top of me. My anger is sky fucking high at this point and I rip the pillow away from my face only to be greeted by the smiling face of, you guessed it, Mikey.

            “Ya got three seconds ta run before I smash ya goddamned face in, Mikey,” I growled, my eyes blazing with anger. He immediately gulped and took off, with me hot on his trail. Screaming and yelling ensued from all parties inside the lair; Leo telling us to cut it out, Don trying to get Mikey off of him, Mikey yelling for Don to save his life, and myself yelling that I’m going to kill Mikey. It’s pretty much an everyday occurrence, but it’s the only thing that seems normal anymore.

            “Raphael, cut it out. I’m not in the fucking mood to listen to you today,” Leo’s ‘leader’ voice yelled over all of us, putting an end to the yelling. We all stopped and looked at him, shocked to see Fearless lose his cool like that. He’s usually calm and level-headed. “and by the way Raph, I know you didn’t come straight home after I told you to. So you’ll be back in the Hashi for the next week,” his growled, leering over his cup of tea at me. My blood immediately boiled and I gave him the middle finger. “Oh real mature, Raph. Let’s make it two,” Mikey snickered in the background before turning away to act like he is fixing some breakfast. Donatello had already poured his cup of coffee and stalked off to his lab to do god knows what, which left Leo and I in the kitchen.

            “Fuck off, Leo. Ya think I don’ already know this shit,” I spat out, grabbing a bowl and filling it with Cereal and milk. Locating a clean spoon, I shoved it into the bowl and promptly shoved it into my mouth, chewing as loudly as possible to piss him off.

            “You mind telling me where you were last night, then.” He inquired, giving me a knowing look.

            “Why, ya followin’ me know, Fearless,” my voice had a taunting tone to it, and I gave him a knowing look right back.

            “Yeah, actually. And I found you at Zoe’s place. What the hell were you thinking,” he gave me an incredulous look as he waited for me to answer. I was honestly shocked at the fact that he followed me, but even more pissed off at the fact.

            “Wow, ya know what, that’s low, Leo. Even fa you,” trying to keep my tone casual and level as possible, I shoved another spoon full of cereal into my mouth.

            “I’m worried, Raph. You’ve been coming home late every night for the past year since—and you’ve been drinking a lot more too. You think I don’t noticed the rank smell of beer and vomit on you? You really need help, Raph. We’re all worried, and we are all here. So please, just—“

            “Fuck you,” I growled, not meeting his eyes. My knuckles were turning a pale green color from gripping the spoon so tight.

            “Raph—“

            “No! I’m done with this shit! You weren’t there when it happened! I literally watched as—there wasn’t anything I could do. I--,” slamming the spoon down on the table, I shot up from my seat and stomped towards the dojo to beat the living shit out of my punching bag. How dare he come at me like that? The fuck doesn’t even know what it’s like, seeing your own father being killed right before your eyes and there isn’t anything you can do to stop it. The image of Splinter’s throat being sliced open by the Shredder’s blade and blood gushing from his severed artery, spraying warm crimson all over my face as he chokes on the blood. The gurgling as his lungs filled with crimson liquid and he could no longer breathe in fresh air, his eyes glazing over as death took his soul; that image will never leave my mind. And he doesn’t understand, because he wasn’t there.

 

Zoe’s Point Of View

            My ringtone was blaring loudly from the living room, startling me from the daydream I was currently lost in. Rushing to answer it, I find that the caller I.D. is showing an Unkown Number as the name. My eyebrows knit together, but I answered it regardless. I’ve never been one to shy away from strange phone calls.

            “Hello,” I tried to keep my voice light, and not sound like I was silently panting from my short sprint down the hallway.

            “Ay, this Zoe,” a deep voice rumbled from the other end of the line. My face immediately perked up and a huge smile graced my face.

            “Raphael! Hey, what’s up? How’d you get my number,” my butt meet the couch cushion as I leaned back into my new couch, still smiling.

            “Call me Raph, would ya,” he gruffed before continuing “and I got my ways, ‘kay. Anyway, my brothers want ta come over and meet ya, again. That cool with ya,” my heart lurched up into my throat when I heard him say his brothers wanted to come over. Sure, I had met them once, but it was under different circumstances. I’m also not a very extroverted person, and I don’t do well with big groups of people.

            “Uh,” the hesitation was clear in my voice and I heard Raphael, excuse me, Raph chuckle on the other end of the line.

            “We’ll be ova by ten. Also, ya might want to order six large pizza, any toppins work,” the line went dead after that. Staring at my phone in confusion, I cursed loudly when I realized that I couldn’t save the phone number to my phone because it was unknown, which meant I couldn’t call Raph back and cuss him out for leaving me hanging like that.

            “Well, shit. There goes my relaxing day,” I huffed, making my way towards the bathroom to put on some makeup and something presentable. “Wait, six pizzas?!” I called out to no one, thrusting my hands into the air.


	7. Your Howling Into The Night Won't Do

Chapter 7

Zoe’s Point Of View

            “You Clint Eastwood lookin’ motherfucka,” I spat out, giving a playful glare at Raph. The others’ laughter rang out like a church choir on a Sunday morning, making me grin from ear to ear. Raph even played along and shot me a smirk as he picked up the pile of cards on the table. We were all playing a card game called Slap Jack. When I was little I used to beg my mom to play it with me, hunting down the cards and shoving them in her face with a pouty lip. “That was totally my pile! You stole that victory from me,” the sentence immediately earned me a snort from not only Raph, but Leonardo as well.

            “You apparently don’t know Raph, then,” Leo chimed, lifting an eye ridge and giving Raph a sideways glance. I couldn’t disagree to this statement, because I didn’t know Raph that well honestly.

            “Well,” I started with a pause, waiting for everyone to turn their attention towards me. “If he’s anything like Casey, and I’d bet all my money that he is, then I wouldn’t put it past him,” jutting out my chin towards Raph and chuckled in response to my own statement, Donatello, Mikey, and Leonardo started soon after me. Raph shot us all a faux-dirty look, grabbing a beer from the fridge.

            “Hey Raph, buddy, don’t you think that three beers is enough, man,” Mikey questioned, looking skeptically at the beer Raph has plucked from the fridge just seconds before.

            “No. Why? Do you,” Raph challenged, his voice holding a threatening and dangerous tone to it. He locked eyes with Mikey as he popped the top open and chugged the whole bottle down in one gulp. The tension in the room was started to coagulate like rigor mortis, settling in between Raph and everyone.

            “Hey, it’s a Friday night guys! What’s wrong with Raph having a couple beers—wait! Are you not twenty-one,” my eyes grew wide in the realization that the guys may not be as old as I thought they were, since Leonardo had never given me any dates on when their origin actually way, just how they came to be and who raised them.

            “We are actually, in human years I suppose, the same age as you, Zoe,” Donatello stated with a matter-of-fact tone that he seemed to use whenever he was giving information. I shot a thankful smile in his direction before shooting Leonardo a questioning one.

            “No, it’s not his age,” was all Leonardo said, still staring Raph down. I felt like they were silently having an argument and that this wasn’t just a one-time thing; it feels like this happens all the time.

            “Oh,” I said lamely, feeling kind of left out. Scooting my chair back, I grabbed my paper plate, and the others, and tossed them in the trashcan by the front door. Turning back around to face them, I offered a fake yawn. “Wow, guys, I’m so tired,” making sure I drew out the ‘o’ in ‘so’ I stretched my arms above my head before slapping them back to my side.

            “We should probably get going, anyways,” Leonardo quipped, standing up from the table and gathering the cups the boys had used and putting it in my sink. “Thanks for letting us all come over, Zoe. It was nice to officially meet the woman who save this guys,” he jerked his thumb towards Raph “life. You’ve also been really kind to us. Hopefully we can all do this again soon,” Leonardo offered me a genuinely friendly smile, the first of the night. I got the feeling that he was overprotective of his family, and after meeting him that first night, I can understand why. Society has not been kind to this family, and has practically torn it apart, as well as each of them as individuals, when it took their father from them. Someone they knew, and somewhat trusted to help them, ended up being the one to lead them to their destruction.

            “Of course,” I gushed, rushing over to give each of them a quick hug. Purposely saving Mikey for last, I slung my arm over his shoulder the best I could and faced all of them, offering them all a wide smile. “I would love it if we could do this a lot more often, actually! You guys are awesome,” saying it made me sound so young, but it felt really honest too. Mikey nodded vigorously, wrapping his arm around my face and giving me a wide smile.

            “Yeah, Angelcakes! ‘Course we will be back,” he leaned closer to me and whispered, not too quietly, “with or without Leo’s permission too, babe,” only to earn a bark from Leo and snickers from Raph and Donatello.

            “It was very nice meeting you, Zoe,” Donatello bowed his head slightly before walking over to the window.

            “Yeah! You’re the bomb dot com,” Mikey gave me a full on hug, squeezing the daylights out of me before bounding over towards Donatello.

            “We will be in touch, Zoe. Let us know if you need anything; I had Donatello leave our number for you if you want to get in touch,” Leonardo bowed his head as well, walking over to the two other brother, pushing them towards the window and climbing out after them. That left Raph and I alone. He dropped the beer bottle into the trash can next to me before turning to face me, twirling his toothpick from one side of his mouth to the other.

            “I’ll see ya lata’, Zo,” he gave me a small smile at the fact that I didn’t protest to the nickname, and quickly made way to the window, jumped through it expertly and shutting it before disappearing like his brothers. I sighed in response, walking over to lock it and close the blinds.

            “That was awesome,” I said again to myself, enjoying the fact that I have managed to make four new friends that seem to like coming over to my place.

 

Time Skip

Casey’s Point Of View

            It’s been about two months since I caught Leo hanging around Zoe’s apartment, and I hadn’t mentioned it to anyone. I started a new construction job and it had me on odd hours for a little bit, causing my sleeping schedule to get all kinds of fucked up. Shit, I barely feel like I’ve seen April since I started it, and I live with her!

            “Casey,” April’s voice rang out from the bedroom, an indication that she wants me to come in there. I picked myself up off the couch and trudged down the hallway, leaning against the bedroom door frame with a questioning look adorning my face. April was sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at my with big eyes.

            “Wassup, Apes? Ya look like ya gonna cry,” I softly prodded, leaving my spot from the doorway to sit down next to her. I wrapped my arm around her shoulder and pulled her close, inhaling the floral perfume she was wearing; it smells so good.

            “I have to tell you something—and before you say anything I want you to hear me out, okay? It’s just, I’ve been hiding it from you and it doesn’t feel right,” my eyebrows immediately drew together as I pulled back a little, staring at her with a questioning look.

            “Okay,” I drew out the word, looking carefully at her as she turned her body towards me and set her leg up on the bed.

            “Two months ago, after we had that big fight about me wanting to meet Zoe, I found her apartment number through some contacts at work and I went there one night after you started your new job. I just really wanted to meet the woman that I knew nothing about, that meant so much to you and yet you never mentioned a word of her to me. So I went to her apartment and knocked on her door. She answered and I barged my way into her apartment, demanding answers. She gave me a vague explanation, but it was enough for me to piece together to basic reason why you didn’t want me to know about her,” April sucked in a breath of air, her eyes starting to mist over. “I don’t want you to be mad at me. She’s really a great person and I can see what you saw in her. She’s beautiful and was very good to me while I was there. She could have yelled at me to leave, got in my face, even tried to physically remove me, but instead she stepped to the side and let me make my way in and remained calm the whole time. She gave me the information she knew I was looking for, without giving me too much. I’m so sorry,” a sob escaped April as she buried her head in her hands, leaning forward to sob into my chest. I scooted closer to her and held her tightly as she wept, stroking her long, fiery red hair. Making ‘shh, shh’ noises to calm her down, I rocked back and forth.

            “It’s S’Okay, baby,” I said the words on repeat, over and over and over again till she finally calmed down, hiccupping from the sobs that she was trying to force down. Finally, she looked up at me with her bloodshot, puffy eyes and waited for my response. I didn’t know what to say, so I just took her back into my arms, kissing her hair and staring at the wall behind her. ‘You should just tell her, jackass,’ my conscious spat at me, disgusted that I never told my wife, the love of my life, about the person who I used to think was the love of my life. I’ve never been one to overshare, and it was a part of my life that I wasn’t proud of.

“I wasn’t a good person to Zoe; I never treated her with the respect and the love she deserved,” I started, my voice just above a whisper. “It felt like, most of the time, that I was usin’ her. I metta’ at a party, she was only a senior in high school fa’ gods’ sake. But there she was, talkin’ to me like I was her best friend, smiling and swayin’ her body side to side to the music. So I asked her out. And we started dating. She was a virgin then, and I…fuck, basically I pressured her into doing things she wasn’t ready for. The girl loved me. But I didn’t really love her. I thought I did, but I always knew I didn’t. I’d ignore her phone calls, her texts and a couple days later would show up at her mom’s place and she’d let me in, forgiving me for all of my mistakes. I wasn’t half the man I am now. Shit, she used to ask me if she was beautiful, and sometimes I would ignore her just to see how’d she’s react. I wasn’t always a jerk, like when her Mom died, I went to the funeral and held her hand. Helped her pack her stuff so she could move in with her father—she didn’t really know the guy that well, but it was the only family she had. I wasn’t about to let her move into my place, but I wanted the best for her. So when she started college, I gave her some bullshit excuse that I wanted her to focus on herself, that I would still be there for her, just couldn’t be with her. And then I disappeared. She’d call me and text me, asking how my day was going, if I was liking my job, what I was doing, but I ignored her. Eventually they came in less and less until finally, one day, they just stopped. Couple months later I met you,” a deep sigh came from my mouth before I could stop it, and April had already removed herself from my embrace to look at me. I could see the pity in her eyes; it wasn’t for me, but for Zoe.

“I see,” she stated simply, looking at the ground. “I understand why you did that, Casey. It doesn’t make you a bad person. You’re a better man to me than you were for her, and I’m thankful for that. I’m glad you told me,” she hugged me tightly, leaving small kisses all across my face. Eventually I gave in and smiled, letting a small laugh escape my lips as I tackled her to the bed and kissed her forcefully. She squealed in delight, wrapping her legs around my waist and rubbing herself against my body. “I love you, Jones,” I heard her whisper as she hooked her fingers underneath my shirt and slowly removed it from my body.

“I love you, Jones,” I mimicked, crushing my lips onto her.


	8. I'm Tired of Talking, Talking, Talking...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! You guys are all more than welcome to comment and kudos! Bookmark and message! I enjoy feedback and appreciate every single one of you!

Zoe’s Point Of View

            It’s been a few weeks since the last time the boys and I first hung out but ever since then, we’ve all hung out every night. They even had April and Casey come over a few times, which was incredibly awkward at first, but after a couple times it wasn’t that bad. Tonight we are all down at the lair. It’s my first time being down here and I was honestly surprised at how much it felt like a home. The smell was something I’ll have to get used to, but the atmosphere and the way that the lair just…is, is just amazing. My apartment doesn’t even feel this home-y!

“This is incredible, you guys,” I exclaimed, throwing my hands in the air with a huge smile on my face. Spinning around a couple times, I tripped over a pizza box and almost died, if it wasn’t for Leonardo, excuse me, Leo catching my fall. All of the guys have insisted that I used their nicknames, since their fathers were the only ones who called them by their full names. At first it was weird, because the only ones I used nicknames for was Raph and Mikey, but that was because they were the two that I saw the most. Leo and Don came around most of the time, but when they didn’t, I could always count on seeing Raph or Mikey (or both).

Raph and I had also grown very close in the past month, since he was the one that came over the most. Mikey was a close second, but I didn’t feel as close to him as I did to Raph. For some reason Raph and I just seem to click—we really get one another. He’s definitely the best friend I’d ever had, and that includes all my ‘girl friends’ too.

“Thanks, I almost died,” I breathed out in relief, removing myself from Leo’s embrace. He offered me a charming smile, something he’s been doing more and more as of late, and quickly gave me a ‘no problem’ before instructing Raph to give me the grand tour while also telling Mikey to start on dinner. They both agreed and we all parted ways, April and Donnie going to the lab to check out his latest experiment and Leo heading to the Dojo to do…well I honestly don’t know. I hardly even know what I dojo is. All I know is what they’ve told me, and basically it’s a spiritual work-out room.

“Casey, ya comin’ bro,” Raph called out as he lead me towards the stairs. Casey grunted in response but I could hear his heavy footsteps behind us as we made our way up the stairs. Raph, in a very Raph way, gave me the tour of their rooms, with Casey and him adding in commentary about each one and their owners. Of course when we got to Raph’s, Casey quickly called out ‘gay’ before shooting down the stairs, Raph hot on his trail.

“I’ll show you gay,” Raph joked, tackling Casey and the two started wrestling violently. I stood at the top of the stairs, staring down at the two goofballs below while shaking my head. The two were definitely two peas in a pod, and I sometimes wonder if that’s what I like so much about Raph. In an odd way, I feel as if I’m attracted to him. Maybe I just have a thing for guys who are too macho for their own good, but Raph also has a very soft side that comes out at the perfect times. He doesn’t share it with a lot of people, but I’ve seen that side of him on more than one occasion when I’ve come home late and he’s waiting in my apartment, pacing around the kitchen with a half-empty beer in his hand. I’d told him not to worry about me anymore, that it is really unlikely that someone is going to try and attack me again, but he still does it anyways. He always scoops me up into his barrel-sized arms, and gives me a huge hug when he sees me entering the front door. It’s reassuring and comforting all at the same time; it’s like I finally have a good reason to come home at night. It makes me feel appreciated and loved, and I adore Raph for opening up to me and letting me see that side of him.

“Ya gonna stand up there all day, or are ya gonna come down here and finish the tour,” Casey’s smartass mouth commented, putting a hand on his hip to add to the sassiness. I glared down at him playfully, scrunching up my nose.

“Fuck off, ya mook,” I shot back. It was an inside joke from our younger days, and I could see the recognition in Casey’s eyes as soon as it left my mouth.

“Fook me? Nah! Fook ya,” he shot back, smiling broadly. Raph was staring at the two of us as if we’d lost our damned minds, shaking his head before meeting me at the bottom of the stairs.

“Ya both are nuts, ya hear,” Raph added, chuckling as he wrapped an arm around my shoulder. I reciprocated by attempting to wrap my arm around his shell, only to rest it on the lip at the bottom of his where it curved out; a perfect arm rest if you ask me.

“We know,” Casey and I quipped in unison, chuckling. “You owe me a coke,” we tried again, only to end up in unison.

“This is too fuckin’ weird,” Raph’s exasperated voice sighed out, leading me towards the dojo. Casey ended up parting ways to go join April and Donnie in…whatever experiment they were looking at. The fact that I knew Casey would have absolutely no clue what the hell was going on in there only made me realize the turd was totally and indefinitely in love with the beautiful phoenix, April. Lucky girl.

“This is the dojo,” the statement was simple, but the image I front of my eyes was anything but. The floors shone brightly under the lighting, a mahogany wood flooring with cherry red undertones. There was a Sakura tree in the corner of the room, as well as a wall full of different weapons that a warrior would use in battle. There was a paper door on the far right side that was closed, and I shot Raph a questioning look as we stepped down into the dojo. “S’the mediation room. Leo’s in there right now. We won’t botha him,” I nodded in agreement, surveying the room once more. There was a punching bag near the Sakura tree, as well as a bench press and a weight rack that had a bunch of free weights.

“Where do you guys get the money for all of this stuff? And who buys it for you and brings it down here anyways,” I questioned, looking at Raph. His electric green eyes were already looking at me when I turned to look at him, causing my cheeks to heat up slightly. He seemed to realize that he was staring and cleared his throat, twirling the toothpick from one side of his mouth to the other and looking at the equipment.

“Donnie does computer work from his lab for people, Mikey was working some kids’ birthday parties, and I, uh, sell my work online,” my eyebrows shot up and I whipped my hand out to grab only Raph’s arm.

“What work,” I quickly questioned, still holding onto his arm. Raph finally met my gaze, a dark green hue with slight pink undertones tainting his cheeks. “What. Work. Raph,” I drawled out, staring at him intently.

“I knit,” he mumbled, using his other arm to rub the back of his neck. I stared at him for a long time, trying to judge whether or not he was joking only to conclude that he wasn’t and that I should not laugh.

“Cool,” I said the word carefully, to make sure I sounded as neutral as possible so that I didn’t offend Raph. He was a very gentle soul and could take things the wrong way if you weren’t careful with his feelings. “You should make me a blanket,” I said this with a little more excitement, running my hand up his forearm to his bicep and back down. The blush that was on his face made its way down to his neck, but we never broke eye contact. The air was growing tense and there seemed to be an electricity to it; almost like if you were to move, you’d get shocked.

“Uhum,” someone cleared their throat, causing Raph and I to jump apart like we had been caught doing something naughty. “I think I heard Mikey call out for dinner,” Leo’s voice said from the door on the right that led to the meditation room. Raph nodded sharply before turning and quickly exiting, not even waiting up for me. My face was as hot as a blue flame and I cleared my throat, looking down at my shoes and finding them really interesting.

“Do you want to see the mediation room really quick,” I looked back up to meet Leo’s ocean blue eyes. Taking a step towards him, I offered a small nod as he led me back into the room from which he emerged.

This room was just as beautiful as the dojo, only it held a more serene and peaceful aura to it. The atmosphere made you feel almost as if you were drowsy with sleep. I glanced over at Leo with half-lidded eyes, suddenly feeling very calm and relaxed compared to a few seconds earlier.

“It’s nice, isn’t it,” He commented, smiling at the face I was making. I nodded slowly in reply, looking around the room again. Four bamboo mats were lined up, one right next to the other in a neat line. A few feet in front of those was a green, delicately decorated, plush cushion that rested on top of a step. There was an incense burner that laid beside it and an urn that was settled a few inches behind it. I gave Leo a questioning look, before I looked back at it. “Our father, and our master,” was all he offered before he placed his hand lightly on my shoulder and led me out of the room. “Mikey is going to throw a fit if we don’t get to the table within ten minutes of him calling dinner,” Leo explained as he walked with me to the kitchen.

Everyone was already seated in their respected places, two spots left open for Leo and I. April and Casey say next to each other, Raph next to Casey, an empty spot left which was next to Mikey, which was next to Donnie, then Leo’s spot. I quickly plopped down into the seat next to Raph and inhaled the delectable scent of Chinese food into my nostrils, suddenly feeling famished.

“Bon Appetite,” Mikey joked, shoving a chopstick full of rice into his mouth. Everyone soon followed suite, laughing quietly at Mikey’s joke. Soon a flow of conversation rolled from one end of the table to the other, a nice back and forth settling between us all. It felt like one big family, sitting at the dinner table eating a home-cooked meal and joking with one another. It was the first time in a long time that I had been in this situation, and it felt so good to be here, with these wonderful individuals, eating dinner and talking. I dare to call them my family, because I feel so closed to them.

I vowed, at this moment, to always cherish and protect these people, even if it would cost me my life. I would do anything for them.


	9. Every Moment My Heart Went All Black and Cold

Chapter 9

Leo’s Point Of View

            The past few months have been nothing short of extraordinary. It seems like the family is finally getting back on track, and we are all slowly but surely getting over the grieving stage of our fathers’ death. I attribute a lot of our healing to the newest addition to the family, Zoe. She’s been so wonderful to each and every one of us and has taken such good care to make sure Raph weans off of his drinking habit that I couldn’t help but grow infatuated with her.

            Actually, if I could be frank with myself, I was infatuated with her when I first started surveying her weeks before we all first hung out. The fact that the woman has a heart the size of Canada just made it that much easier to fall for her. My only problem with this growing infatuation is that I know that Raph is deeply infatuated, close to being in love with her too. Lord know the last thing I would want to do is step on Raph’s toes. I love Raph, I do. We’ve always been really similar in a lot of ways and I fear this is what draws us into Zoe.

            I fear that if I express these feelings to anyone but Master Splinter, then chaos will ensue and the family will end up right where is started, in shambles, scrambling to pick up our pieces. Each time we have let someone into our home, and our hearts, like this there has been nothing but broken pieces. And each time we lose a chip off of our perfect puzzle. We are no longer completely whole, and only time can tell if we ever will be.

“Master Splinter…if only you were here to tell me what to do. I don’t know how to keep leading this team with this tension growing inside of myself. I see them together and I feel green. Figuratively and literally, I guess. If you could just, give me a sign…,” I sigh loudly as I rest my hand on the cool, wood floor below me. I’m bowing down at my fathers’ urn, begging him to give me something. I don’t know how much longer I can keep this envy back.

 

Zoe’s Point Of View

            “Oh my god, you are never going to guess what happened today,” I shove the door shut with my foot as I set my arm full of groceries on the counter while I balance the phone in between my shoulder and ear, pressing it almost painfully together to keep the device from slipping to its utter destruction.

            “Oh em gee, Becky, what,” Raph mocked on the other line, his voice husky and thick with sleep. A smile made its way onto my face, whether I wanted it to or not. The turtle was just so damn cute sometimes, I just couldn’t help it.

            “Oh can it, ya turd. I saved a red-sliders life today,” I bit my lip in anticipation on what Raph would say next, moving across the kitchen as I put the groceries away.

            “No shit? Tha’s what we are, I t’ink,” I could hear him chuckle lowly on the other end and some rustling noises could be heard.

            “Exactly! I saved on of your brethren, Raph. You know, now that I think of it, you really should be thanking me,” I joked, shoving some cans of refried beans into the cabinet and throwing my reusable shopping totes at my front door. “What are you doing”?

            “Well, I was having a very nice nap, but ya ruined that. Why? Ya wan’ me to come ovah,” Butterflies immediately erupted in my stomach, making me feel nauseous. I don’t know why, but the question made me nervous. He’s never asked me that before, and it makes me feel like a sixth grade girl again, going to hang out with her boyfriend.

            “Of course I do. What do you want me to make for dinner? I just got groceries,” I tried to act as natural as possible, but the blush that covered my face mixed with the butterflies in my stomach was making it super hard to keep my cool.

            “Dun care. Just want to see you, really. The foods jus’ a plus, babe,” Cue me dying on the inside from being so overwhelmed.

            “Babe? Uh, that’s a new one,” I was fidgeting with the couch, picking as imaginary lint. I could hear Raph chuckle again.

            “Ya don’ wanna be called that or sumthin’? Let me guess, Head Case called ya that, didn’ he,” my blood instantly ran cold as the small jab. I knew I shouldn’t let it get to me as much as it did, but this is honestly a new side of Raph I haven’t ever experienced. He almost seems jealous, and the hate that seemed laced with the comment hurt my feelings. The comment itself had a backhand twist to its meaning, and knowing Raph as well as I do, I knew that it was more than just a little joke. Usually the air between us is light and playful but the comment left me with a bad taste in my mouth, and I could feel the air shift between us, even through the phone.

            “Maybe tonight isn’t a good night to hang out, I’ve actually got a lot of work to do,” I sighed quietly to myself, running my hand through my hair and grabbing a fist full of it, leaning my elbow on my knee.

            “Oh come on, Zoe. I was jus’ kiddin’ ‘round. I didn’ know ya were so sensitive,” He tried to brush it off, but at this point I was too upset about it to even reply, opting for a dismissive grunt.

            “I’ll text you later, Raph. I’ve got to go,” and I quickly hung up, making sure he didn’t have time to answer. I set my phone down on the coffee table and pushing myself up onto my feet, walking over to the kitchen and decided what I was going to have for dinner.

            ‘Mmm, chicken fried rice sounds good…but Mikey makes it better. Maybe I can have Mikey come over! No, that’ll clue Raph off. Shit,’ I groaned loudly and slammed the cabinet door shut. My text tone went off on my phone and the screen lit up, clueing me that someone decided that I was important enough to text. I walked back over to the coffee table only to see that it was Mikey who texted me.

            -Hey Z, Raph’s pissed. What happened, babycakes?

            I grimaced at the text, opting to not reply. My phone buzzed and chimed again.

            -Btw, I miss you L

            And of course I knew I couldn’t not reply to that, because Mikey is so sweet and I love him so much. The sneaky bastard knows how to pull at my heart strings.

            -Nothing that I know of. I miss you too!!! L L

            I sent the message and went back to my kitchen, shoving the device in my back pocket. I finally decided that a pizza would suffice, and I carefully took the pizza out of the cardboard box and placed it on my pizza stone. Setting the oven to 450 degrees, I felt my pocket vibrate again.

            -Dudette, he’s like, freaking out. Seriously, what happened.

            My phone vibrated again. This time it was Leo.

            -Did you and Raph get into an argument?

            -Hey, Don here, what’s going on? Raph just threw the toaster at Mikey.

            Instantly I felt my eye roll upon receiving Don’s text. We didn’t even get into an argument! I just said I was too busy to hang out. Suddenly my phone started ringing and Casey’s name flashed across my screen. Feeling even more annoyed, I slide the phone button to the right and answered his call.

            “Seriously Casey, if this is about Raph then I don’t want to hear about it,” I snapped, dropping down with a huff onto my couch.

            “Hey Zoe, it’s April,” immediately I felt the air in my lungs leave, making me feel without breath and insanely dizzy.

            “Oh, hey April,” I replied lamely, “What’s up”?

            “Yeah, so Casey just went over to the lair, and I thought maybe you could tell me what was going on. Raph hasn’t been this mad since…his father…passed away,” she chose her words carefully, but I could feel the cold chill in her tone as she spoke.

            “I don’t know why he’s acting this way. All I know is that I told him I didn’t want to hang out tonight because I was busy. Why is everyone freaking out, anyways,” I snapped again, losing my temper. April huffed back in reply at me before replying to my question.

            “Because, Zoe, if you knew Raph as well as you think you do, then you would know that when he gets upset, he can act in very violent ways. He is consumed so much rage and bottled it inside of himself, I’m afraid that he is just now releasing a lot of that pent up anger. I told you if you ever hur—“

            “Okay, first off April, Fuck you. You don’t get to call me from Casey’s phone as a guise that you’re him and start this conversation off like we’re going to get some fuckin’ tea and crumpets. For two, I do know Raph! A lot better than you guys. I do know he has a lot of anger, and unlike you, he talks to me about what makes him angry and upset. He’s even told me about his Father’s passing. So please, fuck off,” I spat, ending the phone call and forcing my phone onto silent, throwing it down onto the sofa next to me and going back to the oven to shove the pizza into it.

            Need to take the edge off after all of that drama, I grabbed a chilled beer from the fridge and headed to the bathroom to start a nice hot bath. I threw some epsome salt in, for an added calming effect, and downed my beer like I was a parched homeless person who hasn’t had water in days.

            “I’m gonna make some fudgin’ tea, because I need to calm the eff down,” I said aloud to myself, nodding in approval. ‘Okay, Zoe, that was only a little Psycho,’ I thought after realizing I had talked aloud to myself. Shrugging my shoulders I quickly prepared some instant tea and went back to my bathroom to soak in the bathtub while my pizza cooked. Turning my bose soundlink II speaker up as loud as I could stand, I turned on my favorite playlist on Spotify and sunk down into the tub, closing my eyes and forgetting all of my troubles.

            ‘I just don’t get why Raph would be so upset. I mean, all I said was that I didn’t want to hang out! And the nerve of April. The fuck man,’ I felt my eyebrows knit together. Bringing my hands up to rub them my hand was snatched in midair and I flung myself up out of the water and screamed as loud as I could. Whoever was in my bathroom clamped their hand down onto my mouth, effectively muffling my screams. I started kicking and flailing my arms to fend off my attacker only to be immediately seized and wrapped up into someone’s arms, holding me still.

            “S’just me! Calm down Zoe,” the person yelled, rubbing their thumb on my arm.

            “Casey,” my voice was laced with confusion as I whipped my head around to face him. He finally let me go and I held onto his arm, careful where I stepped and grabbed a towel off the wall. My floor was covered in water from the struggle and my oven timer was beeping, for god knows how long. I growled like a wild animal and stomped out to the kitchen to turn off the timer and pull out the pizza.

            “Damn, babycakes, you look good in a towel,” Mikey’s voice commented. I instantly screamed again and held my hands on my chest, trying to stop my heart from exploding out of my chest.

            “What in the actual fuck, you guys!?!?!?!”


	10. Nothing Stings as Much Like Never Knowing

Mikey, Don, Leo, Casey, April, and Raph all stared at me as if I had grown three heads. Finally sick of the silence I stomped off to the bedroom to put some clothes on, seeing as my bath was interrupting (rudely, may I add) by Casey and the gang. Mumbling cuss words the whole way back I made sure that I shut and locked the door behind me, wanting more privacy than I had been receiving today. Throwing on my underwear, bra, yoga pants and a sweatshirt, I made my way back out into the kitchen only to find Mikey chowing down on MY pizza.

            “HEY YOU LITTLE BASTARD, GET YER FILTHY HANDS OFF OF MY ZAH,” I screeched, running over to him and snatching the piece of pizza out of his hand. He stared dumbly at me before whining loudly.

            “But it smells SO good. Please,” he made sure to draw out the ‘e’ sound, giving me his best puppy dog face. I snorted and took a huge bite out of the slice that I confiscated, chewing loudly and obnoxiously to prove a point. Mikey whimpered like a kicked puppy before sauntering over to April and not-so-quietly whispering about how mean I was being. April snorted in response, crossing her arms and giving me a once over before settling on a glare. I could tell she was absolutely upset about our last conversation, but honestly this bunch of people are starting to get on my freaking nerves.

            “What is so important that ya’ll had to interrupt my relaxing bath,” I grabbed another slice of pizza, not even bothering to grab a plate. Don fidgeting with a vase I had sitting on my end table by the door, Mikey whistled as if he wasn’t paying attention, Casey was rubbing the back of his head, and Leo, Raph, and April were looking at me as if I had some explaining to do.

            “Well, you see, Zoe, Raph was upset after your last phone call, and he wanted to come over here to talk to you, but we decided that probably wouldn’t be best, but he tried to sneak out anyways. We followed him here, and when we all got inside, we couldn’t hear anything and assumed the worst, except Casey somehow knew you were in the bathroom, and made his way back there only to hear your music. And the rest you know about,” Leo rubbed his head sheepishly, giving me an embarrassed grin. I let out a huff of breath and crossed my arms, staring at the Raph.

            “Seriously,” I said, unimpressed. Raph scowled at me viciously.

            “Yah acted like I killed yer dog, or sumthin’. You jus’ weren’t actin’ like yerself on the phone. Ya were actin’ strange, so I came over here to make sure you were doin’ okay. Fer some reason,” he throws a glare at everyone in the room, “they decided they wanted to know what was going on, and stuck their noses in our business. Now why are you mad,” he took a step towards me and crossed his barrel-sized arms, twirling his toothpick around in his mouth. I felt heat pool in my stomach, but ignored the feeling. ‘He’s pissed and you’re getting turned on, what the hell, Zoe’ I mentally shook myself, trying to focus.

            “What you said was rude,” I said simply, shrugging my shoulders and turning around to grab another slice of pizza.

            “What did I say,” he challenged, lifting his eye ridge. I shoved the pizza slice into my mouth and chewed slowly, thinking on whether or not I should just tell him or drop it. But April’s face was a mixture between mad and smug, and I honestly wanted to go over there and ask her what crawled up here butt and died, because she’s being extremely rude as of late. Instead I decided that I would just get this argument, and apparently now, soap opera over so we all could go on with our merry lives.

            “I’m not getting into it with you, Raph. Especially not with everyone here watching us as if we are some damn soap opera. You know what you said that offended me, and you know that it was also uncalled for. And for the record, no, Casey did not, in fact, call me that. When you said it, it took me by surprise. No reason to get butt-hurt,” I threw my crust away into the trashcan and pointed a figure at Mikey moving it to point at the pizza, letting him know that he could finish the rest. Mikey nodded enthusiastically and moved over next to me to munch on the pizza happily.

            “It was really good pizza,” I commented to Mikey, giving him a small smile. He nodded again, smiling with his mouth closed. His freckled cheeks were so big from all the pizza he shoved into his mouth, he looked like a chipmunk, and I couldn’t help but find it the cutest, most funniest face in the world. So I laughed. And laughed. And kept laughing. Because I was tired of being mad at everyone, and tired of worrying about April, and Raph, and Leo, and everyone else. And damn did it feel good to just laugh. Soon everyone else joined in, seeing Mikey’s face as well.

            And we all carried on as if nothing happened, but every now and again I would catch April still throwing me dirty looks out of the corner of my eye. ‘I’ll have to confront her about this whenever I see her next; right now is not a good time,’ I made a mental notes to myself, still joining into the playful conversation that was taking place.

 

Time Skip

Casey’s Point Of View

            April is ranting again; it’s the third time this week she’s decided that she wanted to rage about how low Zoe was ignoring Raph the way she did and how dare she say that, and how dare she this, and I don’t trust her. I’ve learned the best way to get out of this alive, especially with Apes, is to just let her ride it out until she’s low of fuel and then try to talk some sense into her big ol’ brain. We’ll see how well that works this time.

            You see, April has a distaste for Zoe, from the beginning. Whether it has to do with the fact that I never told her about Zoe or the fact that Zoe is my ex or whatever it is, she has a hard time coming to terms with the fact that Zoe is probably going to be a main character in our plot line for a while. Especially since her and Raph have grown so close—speaking of which, I need to ask him what the hell is up with that.

            “—and what about having a baby Case? I’m tired of waiting! I’m not getting any younger. Casey,” she sits down softly next to me, her voice turning into warm honey, “you out of everyone should know that I am not one to beg, but I am literally begging you, please. Please,” she pleads, resting her hand on my leg and reaching up with her other one to strokes my cheek, planting a feathery kiss on my lips. I could almost swoon where I sit if it wasn’t for the fact that I have no idea how we got on this topic.

            “Apes, babes, I jus’ don’ tink we’re ready. ‘Ow about we getta puppy instead? See how tha’ one goes first,” I hurriedly planted a kiss on her lips, wanting to feel them on mine again before she goes Ape Shit on me for not wanting to have a baby, again.

            She immediately huffs, but doesn’t say a thing. I pulled her close, letting her settle her head on my chest while I stroke her silky hair. What this woman in front of me doesn’t know, is that I’m seriously considering having a child with her; I just need to make sure I’m able to give her what she wants.


	11. What You've Been Up To, Whose Bed You've Been Crashing In

Casey’s Point Of View

My knee is bouncing erratically as I sit in a small plastic chair, with no arm rests. Whose fuckin’ idea was it to make chairs without armrests anyways? The Nazi’s?! ‘God this better be worth it,’ I snort at the thought and lower my head to my hands, resting it there for a couple seconds before blowing out another breath and running my hands over my face, then through my hair.

            “Casey,” an unfamiliar voice calls, prompting me to bolt up from the chair, pushing it back a bit from the force, causing it to screech. I rush over to the nurse who directs me back into the white room I had just occupied.

            ‘I wonder if they even think about the fact that men just masturbated in this room, probably to the thought of their asses,’ I glance at all of the posters, avoiding eye contact with the nurse.

            “The doctor will be in shortly with the results, Mr. Jones. Is there anything else I can do for you today,” she smiled politely and I finally meet her eyes. Giving her a curt shake of my head she gave me another small smile before turning around and leaving, closing the door softly behind her. ‘Fuckin’ pervert. She’s a nice woman,’ I scold myself, ashamed that I just practically mind-fucked the nurse. ‘She’s someone’s daughter…’ I scowl at myself again, bouncing my knee in anticipation. After what seemed like a million years later, the doctor knocked on the door, waiting a second or two before walking in. He, too, had kind eyes, and was holding a clip board that most likely had the results of the test on it.

            My stomach was churning with nervousness and I felt like at any second I could throw up. He sat down on the stool in front of me, setting the clipboard down on the table beside him. Giving it a quick once over, he checked the next page before blowing out some air from his mouth and taking off his glasses. A horrible feeling washed over me and I felt even more sick. ‘This is not going to end well. Dammit,’ I cursed to myself, my face growing more and more cold from the blood draining from it.

            “Mr. Jones, I have your results, and I have to say, that I am so sorry. The test results show that—“ I cut him off, not ready to hear it yet.

            “—S’okay, Doc. I get it. Just means that I can’t give Apes what she wants,” I gulped down a fair amount of hair, blinking hard to keep the tears back. I rose to my feet, preparing to leave this place as fast as possible but the Doctor stood up with me, blocking the door.

            “Mr. Jones! I think you misunderstood me, shame on me for trying to make a joke I suppose. I was going to say that you are, fertile. And you are more than able to have children. But I do have to question you on whether or not you and your wife have been trying to have kids, and talk you through some options on how to get pregnant. Please sit down, Mr. Jones,” and in that moment, all the stress in my life melted away, and happiness washed over me like the ocean tide before a storm, bringing nothing but a smile to my face. I plopped down on the table again, listening intently as the Doctor explained all the factors and ways to get pregnant if it is seeming difficult.

 

Zoey’s Point Of View

            Ever since that night, a few weeks ago, Raph and I haven’t seemed as close as we were. I think it is mostly on my part. Raph still texts me every morning to say goodmorning and ask me how I slept but I just am distancing myself from him. After that fight I realized that I like Raph, like, really like him, more than a friend. That causes me a lot of inner turmoil. Being that he is mutant and I am a human, it seems borderline beastiality and I wonder on the specifics on a lot of aspects of the relationship. Not to mention the fact that him and Casey are basically the same person, expect Raph has a softer side to him than Casey does. And Raph has probably never had a girlfriend, let alone experienced any physical or mental attraction, if he even is attracted to me.

            Maybe I am just over thinking all of this. I was so hurt by Casey that I have a hard time trust people and I read too much into the small things, so maybe I’m overthinking all of this and maybe Raph is just being a really amazing friend. But if that is the case then I need to distance myself, still, because I am falling for him, and it will not end well for me. The inner turmoil that swims in my gut makes me feel sick, and I fight the urge to call Casey and just spill everything that has been going on with me lately. We’ve come to terms with our new budding relationship, but I still am careful to how much I contact him because I do not want to seem like I am trying to wreck his and April’s marriage. I respect their relationship, and I am honestly and truly so happy for them. But Casey has taken to confiding in me about the fact that April wants to have kids, but he is not sure if he can give that too her, because he may be infertile. His parents had a hard time conceiving and it had taken a toll on their relationship, but after many years of trying they finally had him and his sister. Which was a blessing to that family, as well as everyone whose lives that family has touched. But April is not as patient, and she is beginning to think that Casey does not want to have children with her.

            Casey doesn’t want to tell her about his insecurities, because she will make a big deal and fuss over him, making him out to be some poor soul. He doesn’t want pity, he wants understanding and someone who will give him the space to work out his inner feelings. This is all according to Casey, of course, seeing as April will not even look my direction anymore without a heated hateful look on her face. Casey says to just give it time, that it will pass and she will finally realize that I am not a threat and that I’m not out to get anyone, but honestly, I do not see that happening for a long time. I know April’s type, and we do not get along. Which is also why I am so confused on how Casey fell in love with her—but I mean opposites do attract so I’m not trying to bash their relationship.

            My phone chimed, indicating that I had received a text message on my phone. I broke my train of thought and glanced over at it, not even bothering to try and pick it up. It could either be Casey or Raph, and honestly I did not want to speak to either of them right now.

            “Are you going to see who that is or are you going to just stare at it all day like it shot your dog,” a deep voice boomed from the doorway beside me. I practically jumped out of my skin, whirling my chair around to meet the person that almost made me crap my pants.

            “Avery, seriously, do not ever do that again without a warning first, okay,” I warned, throwing him a glare before looking back at the phone. “And no, I don’t plan on answering it.”

            “Guy trouble? Huh, I guess I just assumed with you owning your own business that you were not only successful in your career, but in your personal life too. Aren’t you married,” I threw a confused glance his way before picking up my left hand, putting it in the air and wiggling my fingers to show that I was not wearing a wedding ring. “Huh…well, you want to go out with me sometimes,” He threw me a smirk, which was probably meant to make me swoon.

            “Avery, if you ever try to flirt with me again, I will fire you for sexual harassment, got it,” I growled, picking up my phone and storming off to meet my next patient.

 

Time Skip

            I was standing in front of the apartment building, waiting to meet him. ‘What is taking him so long,’ I complain to myself, looking both directions. Finally, I see him rounding the corner, his figure masked by the shadows of the night. I waved my arm, greeting him. He lifted his arm in the same manner, waving it back. A smile made its way onto my face and I made my way towards him to meet him halfway.

            “So what is the emergency, Case,” I stopped right in front of him, glancing up at his face. He had a large smile plastered on his face, and it must have been there for a while because his cheeks were red from the rush of blood. I reached out and grabbed his arm, holding it in my hand for a second before giving it a reassuring squeeze and dropping it back to his side, positioning myself by his side. We started walking again, enjoying the cool breeze on our face indicating that summer would be ending soon, and winter will be drawing closer.

            “I’m able to have kids, Zo,” Casey’s voice held excitement, and he choked up a bit at the end, giving me a sideways look. I stopped walking and grabbing both of his arms, a huge smile on my face.

            “Are you serious? Casey! That is so amazing—I’m so happy for both of you,” I rubbed his arms with my hands, looking at him. He started laughing, embracing me into a large hug. Giving him a big squeeze, I immediately untangled myself from his embraced and motioned for us to keep walking.

            “The doctor gave me a bunch of pamphlets to look through and talked to me ‘bout all this crap that I didn’t even get, but I’m able to give her kids, Zo. I’m able to be the man she deserves,” he chuckled a bit, choking back the happy sob that was bubbling to the surface. Casey is many things, but a crier he is not. So this immediately let me know the seriousness behind it, if I hadn’t of already known from the moment he had told me.

            “When are you going to tell her,” I looked at the ground, a smile still on my face as I considered all the possibilities that lie ahead for those two.

            “I’m not. I’m going to show her,” grimacing, I smacked his arm playfully as I stuck out my tongue.

            “Gross, Casey. I did NOT need to know that,” he laughed in response to my statement, heading in the direction of my apartment. “Casey, your apartment is the opposite direction. Go home to your wife. I will be fine,” I ceased walking, looking at him seriously. “She deserves to be told…in whatever way you…uh…decide,” I made a grossed out face, looking at the ground still.

            “Yeah, yeah. Raph told me to make sure you got home safe tonight, though. ‘Parently there has been some robberies around dis area, Zo. You ain’t safe walkin’ by yourself,” Casey accent finally settled back in. I smiled softly to myself, enjoying the familiar rhythm of his speech. When Casey is nervous, he will talk very proper, for him at least. The first time I ever heard him talk like that was when we finally had our first date, and the whole night I was so irritated because he was being so proper and trying to impress me, when all I wanted was for him to be genuine with me.

            The air blows my hair around my face, forcing me back into the present. Casey is now holding my arms, looking at me thoughtfully. I meet his gaze, sending him a warm gaze. He tries to fight a smile from gracing his lips, but it finally wins the silently battle, settling beautifully on Casey’s full lips.

            “You’ve always been my rock, Zo. And I love ya for that, ya know? But ya deserve to be happy. Please, jus’ give ‘em a chance. He really cares,” and suddenly I have the feeling I missed a very important part of this conversation when I was spacing out. I feel tears prick at my eyes. “It wasn’ easy lettin’ ya go. You’re wonderful, but I could nevah give ya want ya deserved. I could never be in love with ya as deeply as ya loved me. But Raph is really mad aboutcha. Call ‘em,” tears rolled down my face and I move Casey’s arms to wrap them around my shoulders as I bury my head into his chest, embracing him.

            “I’m just so scared. You really hurt me, Casey. And I know I deserve better than what you gave me, but I’m scared. What if I can’t give anyone the love they deserve, because of what you did to me,” my voice was muffled by his shirt, but Casey learned early on how to speak my muffled speech. He inhaled deeply, bringing my face up to look at his.

            “You are so much better than that, Zoe. What I did was unforgivable and yet here you are, being my confidant and my best friend. Being here for me and my wife. Trying to form a relationship with her. You’re an amazing person. You deserve this, Zoe. Give it a chance,” he carefully pushing me back, still looking me in the eye with a determined look. I huffed, trying to relieve the feelings that are forming within my chest, making it feel tight.

            “I’ll call him,” I finally say, looking up through my lashes. Casey has a smirk on his face, and rests his hand on my shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze before walking past me towards his apartment.

            “Be careful, Zo,” He calls over his shoulder, looking both ways before jaywalking to the other side of the road, making his way quickly towards the love of his life, leavening me standing at the spot that we once both occupied, staring after him. It’s been a really long journey, but I’m finally realized that I am no longer in love with Casey Jones, but I love him with every fiber being within me, and I would be willing to do anything to make him happy. And if that means being his best friend and his confidant then so be it. I deserve to be happy too.

            “Fine, I’ll call him,” I say softly to Casey’s retreating figure, smiling a little to myself and shaking my head as I turn to make my way to my apartment, only to be met with a fist straight to my face, followed by darkness.

Chapter 12

Leo’s Point Of View

            “What do you mean you haven’t heard from Zoe all day,” the question slips from my mouth before I intended it too, glaring at Casey. My arms are crossed in front of my plastron and Raph is standing to my right, with the same stance and facial expression. Casey called us in the late afternoon to see if Zoe had stopped by, and Raph said he hadn’t really heard a word from her all day. I, too, hadn’t received a text back from her when I had texted her earlier to see how her day was going.

            She and Raph have hit a rough patch in their friendship since their last ‘fight’ and Raph reared his ugly head. It really ruffled her feathers and she hadn’t been responded to him quite like she used too, instead she took to talking to me more whenever we all hung out. Zoe and Raph were supposed to hang out and talk things out tonight, though, and when she didn’t show up Raph got mad and came home, and then Casey, with Casey-like timing, called.

            As soon as we heard the news we came straight over to April and Casey’s apartment. Casey then told us about how he met her after his doctor appointment, just a regular check-up, since they were in the same neighborhood and they could walk home together. He left her at her street after she insisted she could walk down the street to her apartment by herself, and that was the last he had seen or heard from her.

            I could hear Raph’s heavy breathing, and Don put a hand on his shoulder to relax him. When Raph gets overworked, he takes to heavy breathing and his muscles will start twitched—which is a huge improvement from when we were teenagers and he would take his anger out physically, often resulting in us knocking the shell out of eachother.

            “I dun know anyting else Leo, swear. Shit, I shoulda jus walked her home,” Casey put his head in both of his hands, letting out a frustrated growl.

            “Well, she ain’t answerin’ her phone. And none of us have heard from her all day. I say we go ovah there,” Raph turned to look at me, as if asking my permission.

            “Casey, go get your gear and meet us on her rooftop in ten,” my voice comes out a lot stronger than I felt, giving me a little hope that maybe we would find her watching t.v. in her living room and maybe she had lost her phone, or just not checked it; that all of this is just us being paranoid and that we just need to relax and give her space. “Let’s go, team,” and we all jump out of their window, one by one.

            The wind is cool tonight and it feels good against my skin as we dart across the rooftops, making our way as quickly and quietly as possible. When we finally land on top of her building, I signal for them to stay there, much to Raph’s protest, and I make my way to her window, risking a glance in.

            The windows are covered by her curtains, indicating that she hasn’t been home yet. When I used to patrol by her apartment to make sure she wasn’t going to rat us out, I noticed that she would pull back her curtains when she got home, and keep them pulled back until she left again. It was like a sign that she was home, and that was how I knew whether or not to stay on the rooftop and observe her or go out looking to see where she was. ‘This is not good. We need to find her, and fast,’ I panic, climbing back up onto the rooftop to find Casey had joined us, and was waiting impatiently for an update.

            I shake my head, and Raph yells boisterously at the sky. He picks up the nearest thing near him, which happened to be a chair that Zoe had most likely placed on the rooftop to wait for us, and threw it as far as he could. Normally I would scold him for this kind of behavior, but honestly I couldn’t find it within me to. Probably because I want to do the same thing at this moment. I really like Zoe, and to think that someone, one of our enemies even, could have her in their custody, leaves me with a horrible taste in my mouth, and makes me feel murderous. I’m not ready to lose another special person in my life.

            Losing Master Splinter nearly killed me, but losing Zoe would end it all for me. I would have nothing left, nothing to keep me going. I would have failed in my role as leader, protector, as fearless.

            I can’t let this happen.


	12. I Wanna Get Rid Of The Feeling, Turn It All Around

Zoe’s Point Of View  
The first few days I was here I had a good sense of time. But after the third day I’ve had trouble keeping up, with not having sunshine and all. I don’t even know how long I’ve down here. A rough estimate would put me at ten days; but I can’t be sure. It may be less and it may be more. I’ve given up hope on anyone finding me. My captor, he calls himself John, keeps me locking in a basement, who knows where. I heard them mention Pennsylvania once, but that was probably just to throw me off.  
I’m alone.  
I miss everyone so much: Raph, Leo, Casey, Mikey, Donatello and even April. This man, John, barely feeds me, only gives me water if I beg, and leaves me in my own waste. I am dirty, and I just want to go home and take a shower. John hasn’t told me why he has me, and he’s never physically assaulted me until today.   
It started off like every single other day that I’ve been here, except John was in a really crappy mood. I could hear him on the phone upstairs, pacing around what I presume to be the living room, talking to someone on the phone. The conversation lasted a long time, ending with him slamming down the phone and stomping over to the door that led to the basement, where I am currently staying. Pure white light blinded me as he opened the door and stomped down the stairs and looked right at me. His piercing blue eyes held murder and I swear if looks could kill I would have died right there; but I didn’t. And he beat me. He beat me like a dog that shit on the floor one too many times.   
And he kept beating me.  
And beating me.  
And beating me.  
And finally when he stopped. He wiped his bloody hands on his shirt and mumbled about how I made a mess all over his nice shirt and stomped back up the stairs, slamming the door shut behind him and locking me in. Fighting the tears that threatened to spill from my eyes, I laid on the cold concrete floor, staring into the darkness.  
I used to be afraid of the dark. When I was real little. My older cousin used to lock me inside the closet at my Grandparents house and keep me there until my crying was loud enough that it alerted one of the guest. Ever since then I’ve had trouble with being in dark places that I’m not really familiar with.   
But now, I embrace the darkness. It’s all I have in this hell hole. And I curse myself every day for being so stubborn and not calling Raphael. Maybe things would be different. Or maybe if I would have asked to learn some self-defense moves from Leonardo I would’ve fought back, and I would have been at home watching friends, eating orange-flavored cinnamon rolls, enjoying my time waiting for the boys to finish their patrol.  
Instead I am here.  
Alone.  
With nothing but my thoughts.  
And if I could be brutally honest with myself, I’m probably going to die here. So I might as well close my eyes and let the darkness consume. So I let my eyes flutter till they close, lulling myself into sleep, hoping I don’t wake up.

Raphael’s Point Of View  
It’s been three weeks since Zoe’s disappearance, and our hope is quickly dwindling to nothing. Donatello is trying his hardest to try and find her but we have nothing to go on. Twenty-four hours after her disappearance Casey reported her missing to the police, but nothing in their database indicates that they have any information on her whereabouts either.  
This is driving me crazy.  
If I would have just gotten over my stupid pride and ego maybe this wouldn’t have happened. One of the most important people in my life is just suddenly ripped away, without a trace or any hope that she could be alive.  
Leo a week and a half into our investigation found Karai and practically beat her senseless, trying to withdraw any information the bitch might have. Karai said that the foot has nothing to do with it and that they weren’t even aware that we were interacted with a new individual outside of our group. This didn’t eliminate them as suspects, but as the next week went by we finally ruled them out, seeing nothing that would link any of them to it either.  
But then the news reports of girls turning up missing started rising only to be found a few days later dead in the park. But all of them were identified, and none of them were Zoe. They dubbed this new serial killer, John, because he’s been picking up prostitutes, saying his name is John, and never dropping them back off. The prostitutes the police interview indicated that the man stood about six foot five and had short, brown hair, with piercing blue eyes.   
The police sketch showed what he is supposed to look like, but honestly he looks like every person in the frickin’ city to me.  
Also, Zoe isn’t a prostitute, so we ruled him out at being her kidnaper, until this morning.   
Leo had the morning news on after breakfast and was watching it with Mikey and Donatello when a news break flashed onto the screen, saying that another body was found, this time the woman was not a prostitute, but a high-class wealthy woman who owned a business.   
Donatello had flown up from the couch and into his lab to pull up the police database to scan for this information. Once he found the woman’s database profile he began to looking through the pages vigorously, and quite frankly faster than any of us could comprehend.   
“AHA! Mmmhmm…Oh…oh my,” Donatello chided to himself, finally settling on a page and scanning through the document as quickly as possible.   
Leo, myself and Mikey all crowded around him to take a look at what he was reading only to be startled when the purple-clad turtled whipped around and looked at each and every one of us with a serious look.  
“The woman that was found this morning dead had a business right down the street from Zoe’s clinic. She was also last seen in the same area that Zoe was, approximately seven weeks ago. This doesn’t look too good, guys,” his gaze finally settled on me, unnerving me.   
I wanted to punch something because I just felt angry at everyone. Why Zoe?  
She’s a wonderful person and never deserved any of this. If she’s with the sick bastard right now who knows how long she’s got, or if she’s even still alive.


	13. Get Out The Door And Disappear

Zoe’s Point of View

            Every single day since John first beat me he has continued. Sometimes it was just a few slaps, and sometimes…My eyes travel to where I presume the floor is, staring at the darkness, fully accustomed to it by now. John is pacing back and forth upstairs, probably deciding whether or not to just get it over with so he can dump my body and start fresh in another state.

            He had brought me company a couple weeks ago; her name was Jennifer. John decided to give me a play by play of exactly what he was going to do to me: tying me down, raping me, slitting my throat and watching ecstatically as my blood pours all over the concrete floor, staining it a brown color. And after the euphoric state of control is over, he lets the body drop dead on the floor, glaring harshly at it before disappearing and reappearing with a chain saw.

            I watched in horror as he cut her to pieces this time. Not his usual MO, he changing the game, covering his tracks. Making it look like someone else is afoot here.

            Click. Creeeeeek.

            The basement door opens, and I feel a cold chill make its way up my spine. When did John stop pacing? His heavy footsteps stomp slowly down the wooden stairs, which whine in protest every once and awhile under his weight.

            “Oh Zoe,” his baritone voice fills the stagnant air, “This has been so much fun. But as you and I both know, it can’t last,” his boots finally hit the concrete, the zipper on the sides of them clinking as he steps. I’m going to die. “You see, Zoe, the police are finally catching onto my scent, and are on their way over as I speak. I want to leave them a gift, and what better gift than your severed head waiting for them at the door,” he flips on the light switch, allowing me to see the wicked smile that is gracing his lips. I wish he would have just kept them off. At least then I wouldn’t have to face death itself in the face.

            John rushes forward and grabs me up by my neck, lifting me easily off of the floor, choking me. I don’t struggle, I’ve been expecting this. Waiting and wishing for this. I don’t want to live like this anymore. I’ve given up.

            A few gurgling noises make its way out of my throat, and I look at the ceiling, not wanting him to be the last thing I see when I finally close my eyes. Different colored dots start dancing in my vision and I can feel the burning in my chest and throat from the lack of air. My throat hurts from him squeezing me so hard, and I can finally see it.

            “FREEZE! POLICE! DROP THE GIRL AND PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR,” John jumped, startled at the interruption. He dropped me roughly onto the ground and turns to the officer who interrupted him. A roar ripped through his throat as he barreled forwards, only to be shot at least a dozen times by the police. I’m coughing so loud that it echoing in the silence that has fallen over all of us.

            They are taking a good look at the scene in front of them, as if they can’t believe that this was actually happening. That they had found me alive, but that my road to recovery would not be any easy one. The blood stains on the floor, my waste, as well as others, covered the floor. The officer that had spoken earlier carefully walked towards me, talking to me but his words were not reaching my ears. I laid on the ground, just staring at his boots.

            ‘Those are the same boots John wore,’ was the last thought to cross my mind before I passed out.

 

Casey’s Point of View

            “Let me see her! I am her family! Please,” I yell at the doctors as they block me from accessing the hospital. The police had found Zoe, alive, and had brought her to the hospital for an examination. Now the stupid fucking staff won’t let me in to see her, to ask her if she’s okay, to let her know that we are all here and we are all so happy that she is alive. To tell her we love her, that I love her. That I wouldn’t know what to do without her here. She’s my best friend, and as much as April doesn’t like it, I love her, so much. Of course, I don’t love her like I love April, but I do care deeply.

            Ever since the day she disappeared I’ve been a mess. We all have. But I’ve felt responsible. If I would have just walked her home and not let her tell me no, she wouldn’t have been kidnapped. Even if the creep had tried to get her I would have been there to protect her. I would have fought for her.

Zoe…

“Oh, Jesus Christ, let him through! He’s the one who reported her missing,” The police chief interrupted, pushing past the staff and grabbing my wrist, dragging me through. I gave them all a smug look as I was dragged through the halls, getting closer and closer to Zoe by the step. “Now listen, Casey, she’s been through a lot. Her mental evaluation didn’t go well. She’s suffering from severe post-tramatic stress, and her physically condition isn’t any better. Zoe is severely malnutritioned, dehydrated, and her airway was almost crushed from an incident at arrival. She shouldn’t be left alone for a couple months and I’m putting her on suicide watch,”

            The air left my lungs.

            ‘Suicide watch? Zoe? Zoe…’

            I nod, following him through the door. Immediately when I entered the doorway I spotted Zoe sitting cross-legged on the hospital bed, staring at the wall. Her skin was pale, her eyes were covered by black circles, whether they were from bruising or from sleep deprivation, I couldn’t tell. Her hair was lack-luster, her cheeks were sunken, she had purple, green, blue, and yellow bruises over her whole body except her neck, which was covered by black and blue finger outlines, looking like someone had tried to choke her to death.

            Tears immediately burned my eyes and I choked back a sob, stepping forward to reach out to her. Zoe immediately flinched, and glanced up at me, sending a shiver up my spine. The look in her eyes was one I’ve never seen before. She looked dead inside.

 

Zoe’s Point of View

            Everyone at the hospital was very nice to me. They brought me jello and pudding, water, got me cleaned up. But the weight of everything that has happened to me is weighing heavily upon my shoulders and I feel exhausted, and scared. Every time I try to close my eyes to go to sleep I have nightmares about Jennifer, or John. Sometimes I even have nightmares about being taken, screaming as loud as I could and no one stopped to help me.

            “Zoe, please, talk to me,” Casey grabs my hand, tears threatening to spill from his eyes. They are red and puffy and he looks like he hasn’t slept well in weeks. I reach forward and run my fingertips lights underneath his eyes, looking up at him curiously. “I’ve been a mess without you, we all have. We are so glad to know that you are alive and will be able to make a recovery,” He kisses my fingertips lightly, running the back of my hand against his cheek. I can feel the prickly beginning of his five o’clock shadow.

            “She actually can’t speak, even if she wanted too,” We both looked at the doorway at the doctor that had entered, “She is suffering from not only a monumental amount of swelling in her throats, but she also hasn’t used them in what seems like months, and she’s also suffering from post-traumatic stress, which could also be a reason she isn’t speaking. It might be a trigger for her,” he smile softly at us, before going over and checking my monitors, IV’s, and my bruising. “Can she stay with you and your wife, Casey Jones” he holds his pen to his clipboard, writing furiously. I look over at Casey, waiting for an answer.

            “Yes, she will be staying with me and my wife,” He nods affirmatively, looking over at me through the corner of his eyes and smiling slightly. I try to smile back, but quickly drop it, dragging my hand away from Casey’s.

            “Good, then it’s settled. She can leave. I’ll get a nurse to remove her IV’s and I’ll make up some directions to help her get back into tip top shape, as well as appointment dates and times so we can monitor her progress, as well as some support groups she should attend,” Casey nods looking down at the ground trying to process everything.

            We have a long road ahead of us, don’t we Case?


End file.
